Altruistic Acquaintance
by Brophy
Summary: People considered him a god on the football field, never mind his devilish reputation outside the sport. After all, that was what Riggins was, right? Part god, part devil? She didn't realize she was trying to save someone who didn't want to be saved.
1. Prologue

_**Altruistic Acquaintance**__ – by Brophy_

_Disclaimer: FNL ain't mine, just so y'all know -giggle- Sorry, needed to get that out of my system. Watching the episodes for two days straight made me talk like a Texan. Father dearest was even questioning whether I was his legitimate child or not -more giggles- I don't blame him though ;)_

_Whilst I'm working on my two covenant fics I thought it might be nice to get into a new fandom. It's a little more than unnerving, so thank you to those who've encouraged me along the way :)_

_Wrote up a oneshot for this story (just for the fun of it) and then I thought, what the heck, I'll use it as a prologue instead!_

_Picture of our leading lady is in my profile. Hope you enjoy!

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Prologue

She's in trouble.

Big trouble.

Sitting with that Riggins boy.

Funny how a simple thing like sitting can mean a whole lot of trouble.

A hell of a lot of trouble.

He knew Jennsen was at the library. She didn't like to eat in front of people. Only ever snuck food in occasionally during class or at the library and stuffed herself silly at home. It was just a habit for her. Just like it was a habit for him to call her Jenny, which annoyed the hell out of her. But she'd annoy the hell out of him, too. It was no wonder that they argued with each other all the time. No massive tantrums or anything, just the average bicker and quarrel.

Until yesterday night, during dinner.

That was like, the granddaddy of all arguments they'd ever had.

He felt pretty shitty for saying all those mean things to her, so when he woke up the next day, he thought he might take Jenny's suggestion to heart and visit her. She'd said it might be good for him. He didn't know how it would do any good, seeing his sister at school when he saw her at home. The only difference was the amount of people; and all those people saw was a half-crippled guy trying to make his way through a school. The teachers seemed nice though, said occasional hello's or gave polite smiles; but the students were all for blatant staring and strange looks. He knew he made the right decision not continuing school.

Jennsen didn't want to come to Dillon. The 'rents knew that. And she kind of drifted apart from them after the move. He supposed it was his fault, getting injured in the game. There weren't many fond memories at that old place in Austin, and Mom and Dad just wanted to start it fresh.

They weren't looking for her consent.

One thing was for sure, Jenny hated school; hated that he didn't want to go back and that was that, yet she had no choice in the matter and was forced to go, kicking and screaming.

Things changed after that.

Jennsen didn't talk to any of them, except maybe the occasional bit of gibberish to her baby brother. She would make her appearance in the morning to eat breakfast and say goodbye before going to school. He barely even saw her in the afternoon, cooped in her room as she was. In the evening it was worse, especially when the TV was switched off for dinner, creating an even more unbearable silence. Mom would send him looks, too, trying to force him to say something to Jenny, just to initiate some sort of a conversation. Either way, she'd answer with a short reply, entailing either a yes or a no or a mumble. And that was it. She'd say thank you for the dinner, excuse herself, and head back to her room again.

The habit didn't seem to break, no matter how many times they went out together as a family or how many times they persisted as the months dragged on. Didn't help that Mom and Dad were pro Christian, trying to suck her into going to church. She'd stopped going when he did. But he had an excuse. His friggin' career was thrown out the window! It was only right for him to be bitter. Could anyone blame him?

But still...

He supposed she just wanted to prove a point. Show him how sucky school life was now that he wasn't there to tag along with her, now that he chickened out and left his little sis all alone. He hated the guilt trips she'd throw at him.

That was why he listened to her for once...

In truth, he was just going so she could get off his case.

And then look what he finds...

Her and Riggins, sitting next to each other, talking.

And talking isn't just a simple thing. No. It's like, a higher level above sitting. The communication between speakers and listeners, unconscious maintenance of eye contact, hand gestures and small touches. It can get real intimate, sensual almost. Forms an energy around them that leaves them oblivious to everyone else.

That's what's happening before his eyes.

And he's beyond shocked from it.

Jennsen smiles a tight-lipped smile that shows her dimples; something he's never seen from her. It's like a special smile, just for him.

And there's a smile on him too, one that lights up his eyes, makes him look like he's hypnotized by her; watching everything she does with a hungered curiosity. Tim's right hand plays with the pencil resting along his ear, his left hand tapping along the edge of the desk, almost as though he's keeping them at bay from touching her.

Then he pulls his seat closer.

She rests her chin on the palm of her hand, looking down at her work as she speaks. Riggins can't seem to get enough of her, bending his head down to meet her eyes as he licks his lips and asks another question, mouth turned upward to show a bit more of a grin as he talks. Jenny meets his eyes and presses her lips to prevent a laugh. The sound bursts through like a raspberry on a baby's stomach, and then she can't help but laugh. And he's laughing back, as if pleased.

There's an art to talking and Riggins sure is playing her like a finely tuned guitar. Or painting like he's a regular Dali or Van Gogh or someone else like that. Yeah. Someone artsy...

And he's well aware of Riggins reputation on and off the field. He didn't block his ears for the past four years. To other guys it's as though Riggins has this trophy cabinet of all these girls he's bedded. Truth is he wouldn't be surprised if Tim didn't know any of the girls' names. The fullback didn't look like he cared too much; drank beer more than he did breathe. What was more obvious was what the girls had in common him: football or sex – cheerleaders, rally girls or some other chicks that were willing to give.

And Jennsen was not under those categories.

Not that he knew of...

Hopes he doesn't know of.

But this is a strange occurrence. More than strange. Usually, it's the girl that sweet-talks him, not him sweet-talking the girl! And this isn't an ordinary girl.

Well, she is, which makes her unordinary... If that makes any sense.

It was Jennsen.

She was just... Jenny, y'know?

And now that he's watching he realizes that it's too late. His baby sister is growing up. He always thought she detested boys, like when they were kids and she'd say they had cooties. But she grew up, and rather than cooties, she'd say boys were idiots. Not like she was a lesbian or anything – even though she was a gay rights supporter (something Mom and Dad weren't too pleased on; another story for another time) – but she stood her ground when it came to males. Hated football players after everything that happened. He couldn't blame her. She was the kind who vouched never to date.

And now she's sitting with that Riggins boy!

So if she's going to be the typical teen girl and crush on a boy than he's going to be the typical annoying older brother and tell on her.

He grins as he makes his way out of the school and to the parking lot.

Turns out the visit to Dillon High was a great idea.

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_So, anyone interested? Anyone at all? Please? -puppy dog eyes-_


	2. Just A Pretty Face

_Ack! I finally updated in what? 1/2 months? As Lucklily put it, I caught the 'covenant bug'. Tis lethal I tell ya! Speaking of, thank you Lils for all the help and inspiration. I seriously couldn't have done it without you!_

_Anywho, this story is now set in the past, before the prologue even takes place. The first scene should sound a little familiar to those who've watched episode 14 from FNL's 2nd season._

_Enjoy!_

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Chapter One – Just A Pretty Face

"Bitch."

Jennsen looked up, startled.

_He said what?_

The students broke out into murmurs, exchanging looks with one another. Jennsen kept her eyes fixed on the back of Dillon's Quarterback, mouth agape with shock.

"Excuse me? What'd you say?" Mrs. Flynn asked Matt Saracen, more than a little dumfounded.

"My critique is that we're drawing a bunch of sad and stupid pictures of sad and stupid flowers… Oh and I said bitch."

–

"Sweet, shy and innocent QB1? I think not." Yule grinned as she walked down with Jennsen to the school cafeteria. "That's kinda hot."

"Aren't you at least a _little_ concerned?" Jennsen paused as she made her way around a group of clustered juniors discussing tactics for some online game. "That doesn't sound like Saracen to me."

"Oh and you're BFF's with him, are you?"

"I speak to him on occasion in art class." Yule rolled her eyes at the defensive remark. "Look, that's not the point. Point is, he's acting very out of character…" Jennsen looked down at the floor with a one shouldered shrug, face pensive as she recalled all the gossip. "Wouldn't blame him, after all that stuff goin' on and pressure from the town."

Football was more than just a game to people. And the players were more than just people, they were machines; tools.

Tools that could easily be broken.

"That's Dillon for ya."

_True._

Yule was the only person Jennsen could confide in from school, and perhaps the only person she'd ever considered a friend in Dillon. Zoey and Tiffany would hang around with her, sure, but it wasn't as though she felt comfortable telling them personal things.

Yule's full name was Yolanda, but no one had the nerve to say that name in her vicinity. She was honest to a fault, and it was for that reason that most people disliked her. Her intimidating presence and gothic fashion sense didn't help either, but it wasn't as though she was oblivious to it. Yule had said on more than one occasion that if people didn't bother getting to know her like Jennsen did, then she wouldn't bother trying to get to know them either.

Yule took all the crap, from cheerleaders and rally girls calling her emo and spreading rumors about her joining cults, and laughed at it. People got the wrong impression of her, mainly because she looked like Wednesday Addams with a vengeance, but she was a quick-witted and free spirited chick.

"Hey, I wanna grab some grub. Meet you back at the base, 'kay?" Yule said as they reached the cafeteria, jabbing her forefinger at the spare table ahead.

Jennsen rolled her eyes at the remark, watching as Yule cut in line to get her food. She quickly made her way to the table, dumping her bag on the surface before rifling through it to grab a book to read. She wriggled as she sat back in her chair, trying to find a somewhat comfortable position as she began reading.

The scrape of another chair caused her to look up from her book.

Tiffany sat down opposite of her, hands clutching a magazine that she was engrossed in.

"Hey," Jennsen greeted, out of habitual courtesy.

Tiffany gave no greeting or polite smile, just looked at her blankly as she chewed her gum. The curly haired brunette had a thing about gum. If the flavor wasn't gone from it, she'd wait until it was completely tasteless before throwing it in the trash.

Instead of replying, Tiffany blew a bubble at her. When it popped, she used her tongue to pull the gum back into her mouth and resumed chewing.

Now that she thought about it, Tiffany looked like a cow chewing on cud, but Jennsen refrained from pointing it out and continued reading. She'd mention it to Yule later, so that she could do the honors.

"...Um, hey?"

Jennsen sighed at yet another interruption and looked up from her book.

Jean and Sally stood awkwardly in front of their table.

"What do you want?" Tiffany drawled, ill amused.

Jean Binnel's gaze dodged from Tiffany's to Jennsen's, a little uneasy. "We were just wondering if we could sit here." She licked her lips, hands clutching her tray of cafeteria food. "All the other spots are taken, so..."

Tiffany shot Jennsen a meaningful look. She obviously didn't want Binnel and her friend to sit with them.

"Sure you can." Jean and Sally looked shocked as they noticed who spoke the words. "It's a free country. Go for your life," Yule said as she sat down next to Jennsen, gesturing to the empty spots for good measure. Tiffany's eyes narrowed at her. "What, did you need another couple o' seats for your enormously large ass?"

"I do _not_ have a large ass."

"And why is gum the new Atkins?" Yule asked, sending a wink to the two girls who were still standing hesitantly, surprised that the presumed ice queen was letting them sit with her. "The seats are yours, ladies."

Jean and Sally smiled timidly, walking over to sit in the spare seats.

Tiffany scowled, all on her lonesome at the other end of the table.

Jennsen refrained from snickering, returning back to her book once again. The jumble of sounds echoed around her, words spoken by students both loud and quiet becoming a blurred symphony of noise. One question, however, stood out from among the rest, distracting her from her reading entirely.

"So you're saying that Landry doesn't like you?" Sally asked, seated next to Jean.

Jennsen raised her eyes to Jean, gauging her reaction.

Everyone knew she was crushing on Landry. Heck, blatantly obvious would've been the better-fit word. Jean had everything in common with him, from music tastes to film favorites. They were like soul mates.

"I'm not saying that, no." Jean shook her head slightly, brow furrowed. "I'm just saying that I feel like he does, but won't because of skanky beauty queen Tyra." Her mouth twisted into a partial scowl and lip quiver. "I mean, I've got more in common with him, and I actually appreciate him, but it's like…" She tried to find the right word, sighing to herself in self-pity. "I dunno, choosing between a jacket potato and fried chips…" Jean slumped further in her seat, tucking a small dread of her platinum hair behind her ear as she mumbled, "He couldn't say no to her."

Tiffany thought it was best to put in her two cents, because she was just _amazing_ like that. "But if what you're saying is true," Jean's head snapped up, both shocked and annoyed at the person eavesdropping. "Then she'll make him fat too." the brunette's head tilted to the side, eyebrows raised in all seriousness.

Dear, dear Tiffany. One of the strangest girls Jennsen had ever known – pretty, but strange. Most people didn't really like her; the type that bitched and rambled on about something completely off topic and made ditzy comments for a living.

This was one of those moments.

Yule snorted at Tiffany's comment. "You really are blonde," she muttered, taking a sip of her juice.

"Don't be a bitch, Yule. You're ugly enough," she snapped back at the goth.

"Hey, don't y'all remember? I'm a necromancer." Yule smiled sweetly. "You wouldn't want me conjuring my malevolent demonic spirits on you now, would you?"

Tiffany paled a little, her scowl turning down a notch.

Sally and Jean tried to hide their twin smiles.

Yule went to the task of eating her burger.

Jennsen was about to continue reading where she left off, but the sound of a tray whacking against their table a moment later caused her to jolt.

The owner of said tray landed on her seat animatedly, almost pleading for someone to question why she was making all those swooning faces. She frowned as she noticed the two strangers sitting at their table, but her swooning soon returned at full force.

Swoony faced girl was Zoey, a rally girl. Jennsen wasn't sure why a rally girl would be hanging around with her and Yule, but Zoey was all about her image. She probably thought that sitting with a bunch of weird people would make her stand out of the crowd.

"Guess what?" Zoey asked, more a demand than question. She flicked her fringe out of her eyes, hands playing with her short, layered, and thoroughly dyed auburn hair.

"You know, I've never understood that." Yule swallowed the bite of her burger before continuing, gesturing with said burger in her hand as she continued, "'Guess what'? How can you _guess_ 'what'? Wouldn't it be more like 'guess what happened to me?'"

Jennsen raised her eyebrows as she pondered the speculation. "Actually, that's a really good point."

"Ugh, shut up already," Zoey spat out, rolling her green eyes with a scowl on her mouth. Then it morphed instantly into a megawatt smile. "I just spoke with Tim Riggins."

"He tell you his favorite sex positions, did he?"

Zoey glared at Yule, her expression then softening with her wistful reply, "No, he was real sweet."

"What did he ask you for?" Jennsen asked, feigning innocent curiosity.

Bingo.

Her expression change in an instant, looking more dismissive of the question as she answered quickly, "Um, just some help on his homework."

"For you to do it for him?" Jennsen filled in.

Zoey's eyes scanned around the room as she shrugged. "Oh, no. He just, uh, wanted to partner up with me... Compare my work with his."

Yule exchanged a knowing glance with Jennsen.

Tiffany was just hyper and oblivious.

"Oh my god, _ohmygod_! I can't believe you _actually_ _met_ Tim Riggins!" Tiffany squealed. "And he spoke to you!" Her smile turned sly as she chewed her gum at high speed. "So, do you think he'll ask you out?"

"What the fuck?" That was Yule. "Why don't you ask if he's gonna propose while you're at it?"

"I'm not sure..." Zoey glared (no guess as to whom the glare was directed), but her expression turned all starry eyed the more she became swept up in her thoughts of Thirty-Three. "He has his hookups, nothing unusual. But he hasn't dated anyone from school since Tyra. And you know Lyla... She's gone off spreading the word of Jesus, dating one of the bible thumpers she works with. So, I dunno, I think he might be pretty lonely..."

Yule snorted. "Tyra and Lyla huh?" She let out a low whistle. "Pretty sure his next hookup's name will rhyme to. Whatever gets him off."

"You're on a roll," Jennsen remarked with impressed amusement.

"Ain't it great?" She grinned, taking another chunk out of her burger.

Zoey looked beyond angry, arms crossed and head cocking about the place, oozing miss attitude like it was nobody's business. "You are just _so_ ready to convict him, aren't you? If you knew anything about him, you'd know how troubled his life is." She looked away, eyes all hazy with sympathy. "He's just so lost in it all and I want to help him."

Yule's mouth twisted in contempt. Any talk of football and jocks brought out the worst in her, not only because she hated the sport and its players, but because she knew it was a sore spot for Jennsen.

"Dude, he's just using you like some nameless rally girl – oh wait, you _are_ a nameless rally girl – and yet you _still_ help him out?" Yule let out a huff of air. "God, you're stupid."

Zoey looked as though she were about to turn beet red.

Jennsen wondered how they'd all managed to coexist this far without biting each other's heads off.

And Tiffany thought it was best to defend Zoey, before the veins sticking out of her forehead decided to burst. "He's Fullback of the Dillon Panthers, what do you expect her to say? This is _Tim Riggins _we're talkin' about. Have you seen how hot he is?"

Jennsen was pretty sure that Tiffany believed being 'hot' was reason enough for anything.

"All I hear is Riggins, Riggins, Riggins," Yule drawled in boredom. "I really don't care. A pretty face is just a pretty face. I'm not gonna waste my time if I know words won't reach his head."

Tiffany and Zoey both seemed horrified as she spoke the words, eyes drawn to someone over Yule's shoulder.

Yule and Jennsen turned around to see Riggins himself, standing behind her.

The goth looked up at him lazily, not even phased as she took another bite of her burger.

Jennsen pressed her lips together to keep from laughing. The noise, however, escaped her nose into some strange sort of outward snort. The Fullback's eyes snapped to hers, mouth set in a thin line. She clamped her hands over her mouth, trying to keep herself from laughing, but it made her laugh harder.

His face was blank, emotionless, but Jennsen thought she saw a brief spark in those eyes. Then it just faded away into nonchalance.

Tim's gaze turned to Zoey as he murmured slowly, "I'll need it done by lunch tomorrow."

"Yeah, sure, Tim. No problem." She smiled super sweetly at him.

If smiles could give diabetes, this one would take the cake, pun intended.

"'Kay, thanks. I 'preciate it." He didn't look like he did, expression as blank as ever.

"See you around." Zoey batted her eyelashes in an attempt to be coy. It didn't work. Her eyelashes looked like they were about to take flight.

Riggins nodded and walked away.

Jennsen turned back around, noticing five pairs of eyes watching her.

"What? It was funny," she defended grudgingly.

Jean and Sally resumed their conversation, slight smiles on their faces.

Tiffany and Zoey looked unimpressed and disappointed, almost as though her stunt had ruined their reputation.

Yule smirked at her, proud of her 'partner in crime'.

"Eat your damn burger," Jennsen grumbled, resuming reading her book once again.

–

"I think my brain is caving in on itself from all that cramming," Yule groaned, rubbing her temples as they walked down the school parking lot.

Jennsen smiled, untwisting the strap to her shoulder bag. "You'll live."

"Ugh, jocks ahead," Yule huffed. Jennsen looked in Yule's direction, seeing the players walk out after what she assumed was a hard day of practice with Coach Taylor. "I swear, football will be the death of me. So stupid." She was all for complaining today.

"You know them's fighting words."

"_Please_," Yule scoffed. "No one has the guts to beat me up. Guys wouldn't even cross the line when it comes to a girl like me. Fucking pussies."

It wasn't the word, it was the way she said it that made Jennsen laugh. "You just like to call them that for no apparent reason."

"Yeah, I do. There's this sense of satisfaction that comes with it. You should try it."

"I'll think on it," Jennsen remarked dryly.

"Seriously, kid, loosen up. It ain't the end of the world if you cuss."

"Would be for my parents." And there's the gloomy tone.

"And they have swearing radars at school?"

Jennsen sighed, gnawing on her lip briefly. "It's just the principle."

"Either way, they won't know."

"Still not listening."

"Still not dropping the subject."

"Didn't expect you to." Jennsen flashed a false smile as they reached Yule's beat up car, opening the door and sitting in the passenger's side. She wound down the window to get some fresh air in.

Slumping back in her seat and buckling her seatbelt in, Jennsen looked out of the window. She noticed the Fullback walk out, bag over his shoulder and gripped with one hand, his Panther's jacket clutched in his other.

His eyes locked onto Jennsen's suddenly, with a look she wasn't sure of. But he held her gaze for a long time; longer than necessary, she thought.

Or maybe she was just over analyzing things.

The ignition of the car brought her out of her thoughts as Yule changed gears and drove out of the school parking lot.

Jennsen stared aimlessly outside the window, thoughts of schoolwork and conversations flitting through her head.

More prominently, the image of hazel eyes staring back at her.

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_She isn't smitten... Not yet anyway. She's just curious. :)_

_Hope I made it up to you with this chapter. Please, let me know what you think!_


	3. Filler Inner – part one

_I disappeared... Yet again. My computer died on me a while back, so that's my only excuse for this not being posted sooner. Technology repels me sometimes. *sigh*_

_Anyway, thank you all for the reviews. Warning for underage drinking ahead. Stayin' Alive belongs to the Bee Gees, My Girl belongs to The Temptations. Yep, all for the classics right now. :)_

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Chapter Two – Filler Inner (Part One)

Her eyes pried themselves open, squinting in the darkness as she heard her phone buzz from the bedside table. Jennsen had gone to bed early, hoping for a good night's sleep.

No such luck.

She yawned, her arm stretching out blindly on the table before clutching the mobile phone in her hand. She winced against the harsh light of her phone, blinking rapidly before she could make out the bright name on the screen.

It was Yule.

Jennsen flipped the phone open to answer it. "What?" she asked, too tired to sound snappish.

"_Hello, my beloved."_

Jennsen's brow furrowed as she tried to make out Yule's voice from the loud music pumping in the background. "Do you think I should be hanging up right now?" she asked, stifling a yawn. "I think I should be hanging up right now."

It took Yule a while to comprehend what Jennsen was saying before she hastily replied, _"Hey, none of that! There's a party on and I want you to be here."_

"At least go some place quiet so I can hear you," she grumbled.

"_Huh?"_

Jennsen clenched her jaw for a moment, speaking louder this time as she repeated, "At least go some place _quiet_ so I can _hear_ you!"

Yule must have heard most of what was said, because a moment later the music was swallowed off by the clicking of a door. _"So, what's the verdict?"_

"Yule, it's late."

"_I am a creature of the night."_

"My parents don't like me going out to parties. You _know_ that."

"_Where did you get the idea that we were asking them?"_

Jennsen pursed her lips "...I'm not sure Yule." She paused. "This is kinda–"

"_Rebellious?_" Yule filled in. "_Jennsen, you're in your_ teens_. This is the prime part of you growing up! You need to live a little_."

It took a moment for her to respond. "Where is it?"

She could practically hear the smile on Yule's face. "_I dunno, some chicks house_."

"You don't even _know_?" Jennsen asked, tone incredulous.

"_I know where it is, not_ who's _holding it. Besides, they have free booze. Free booze!_" Yule wasn't exactly defending her case all that well. "_Look, I need ya here Jeeeen_," she pleaded.

She _really_ should be hanging up right now.

"_Seriously, please._" The tone in Yule's voice said it all.

"...Alright." Jennsen emphasised her suffering with a long and exaggerated sigh. "I'll meet you down the end of my street. Not anywhere closer. I don't want my parents waking up. They're still freaked out from the first time they saw you."

"_Done deal, chickadee,_" Yule drawled with a chuckle.

She snapped her phone shut, dread balling up in the pit of her stomach as she wondered what she'd gotten herself into.

Jennsen wished she could just say no for once in her life, but Yule had the ability of coercing her into anything. Actually, now that she thought about it, a lot of people did.

And sooner or later that habit would break.

_Things will change,_ she thought to herself.

_They will._

–

Jensen leaned back against a wall, cringing at the smell of smoke, alcohol and sweaty people as her gaze moved to and fro around the room. "Why? Just..." Her eyes closed briefly in frustration. "_Why?_"

"Because you need a social life, for one," Yule said, alcoholic beverage at hand as she stood next to her friend. "And two, it's fun to watch drunk teens do stupid stuff."

"Like you?"

She shrugged. "I take no offense. But hey, I'm a pretty amazing drunk if you ask me." Her face lit up as her eyes locked in on a tray of small glasses some guy was carrying. "Ooh, they have shots."

"Like a moth to flame."

"Don't be hatin'." Yule winked, following said guy as he walked off to another room.

Jennsen folded her arms, eyes scanning cautiously around the place. She'd just let Yule have a couple of drinks and then drag her out of this place. That was it. That _would_ be it.

She didn't have a chance to react fast enough when a drunk girl bumped into her, spilling the contents of the drinks that she was holding. Jennsen stepped back as soon as she could, hunching over so that the alcohol didn't run down her pants.

Going home with booze on her clothes wasn't exactly a good idea. She'd smell like a drunk.

Crap.

Jennsen looked up at the girl in horror.

"Woops," the girl giggled, oblivious to the look shot her way as she trudged drunkenly through the crowd.

Jennsen sighed through clenched teeth, peeling the front of her top and wringing as much alcohol out of it as possible.

She needed a bathroom. Stat.

Searching for an exit, she weaved around the masses of people within the main room and reached the hallway. She stomped up the stairs, dodging a couple who were walking down. All Jennsen needed was a sink, but it took a while to reach the top of the stairs, with all the people blocking parts of the stairway, grinding to the music or flirting loudly. She had to make a conscious effort not to shove them.

Yule had mentioned that there was a bathroom upstairs, but she didn't specify where. She was never specific about things. Jennsen just hoped she wouldn't run into some occupied room. Occupied in the worst kind of way.

She turned round the corner of the hallway, almost bumping into some couple making out. A second glance had her realizing it was Riggins shoving his tongue down some rally girl's throat.

Tim pulled away, lips parted and swollen from kissing, head turning to the intruder. His eyes filled with drunken realization as he met Jennsen's eyes. "Oh, hey…" he trailed off, not knowing her name.

"I'm not going to fill in my name for you," Jennsen said stubbornly. "Because the last thing I need is to be the filler inner. And I'm not one of those people."

Jennsen caught sight of the girl nibbling on Tim's ear. She averted her eyes, meeting the Fullback's gaze once again as his lips quirked into a smirk. "Filler inner. Interesting."

"Whatever," she replied, walking passed him and to the bathroom door – thankful that it had a sign with the word 'BATHROOM' on the front – before knocking on it briefly.

She waited for a response from within the bathroom, until listening to the little moans of the rally girl Riggins was making out with made her teeth grit. "How long will you be in there for?" she asked, banging on the door again.

"No one's in there." The nameless girl latched her mouth on Tim's neck as he spoke. "The door's unlocked."

Jennsen would've blushed with embarrassment, but it was frustration that colored her cheeks. "You could've told me earlier."

"You didn't ask."

She shot him a look that went unnoticed, turning the door knob before entering the room. It stunk of puke and alcohol. Wrinkling her nose, she walked to the bathroom sink, turning the tap for water to come out of the spout. She kept turning and turning the tap, but no water came out.

Jennsen walked out with a huff, sucking on her top teeth as she slammed the door shut and folded her arms begrudgingly.

"Oh, and… the sink doesn't work either."

She looked at the Fullback incredulously.

A bedroom door opened near Riggins, a couple walking out unabashedly with hair messed and garments rumpled. No guess as to what they'd been up to.

"Thank you for mentioning that," Jennsen said, sarcasm evident. She felt it was best to speak. Not let him win, have the last say.

"No problem."

"Whatever. Have fun testing springs," she replied, just as wryly.

"Will do."

The grin on his face told her he would. He kissed the no-name rally girl, both hands gripped on her waist as he pushed her backwards to the inside of the spare bedroom. Jennsen heard the girl giggle before the door slammed shut.

"Gross."

Since when was propriety such an old fashioned idea in this world?

So many girls were willing to whore themselves out to him, not minding the fact that they were becoming the proverbial notch on his bedpost. They weren't looking for rose petals and scented candles, after all.

Actually, considering Riggins' reputation, he was more like the notch on _their_ bedpost. Once the deal was done those girls would stake their claim and boast the boast around school.

She didn't know what they had to boast about.

He was a football player. The token disgruntled and messed up jock. He was a pretty boy, sure, but a man whore at that. He was no god. But the way girls fawned over him made it appear as though he was.

And she didn't understand the hype.

She didn't understand it for the life of her.

And it only served to irritate her.

Jennsen didn't know why, but she felt like a drink.

One that entailed alcohol.

–

"You know what I find strange? " Jennsen slurred drunkenly. "Kissing. I mean, the lips, the tongues," she sloshed the cup around in her hand as she gestured. "The closing of eyes. Isn't it strange?" Her eyes squinted a little as she repeated, "You close your eyes."

The guy – she didn't know who, some random person – shuffled closer, hand snaking around her waist. "Well, it'd kinda be weird if you didn't." He smirked, amused at her questioning.

"And who decided it'd be weird? Who decided there'd be that awkward feeling if your eyes were open?"

"It's human instinct." She felt his breath against her neck, then lips.

Jennsen burst out laughing, both from his comment and how ticklish his lips felt against her skin. Quieting her laughter, an immediately sombre expression crossed her faced as she murmured, "Human instinct is a weird bit of mumbo jumbo."

"Hey, you!" The lips were pulled away from Jennsen's neck as a familiar voice seethed, "What the fuck do you think you're doing with my girl?"

Jennsen smiled brightly at her friend's face. "Hey, Yollie. How's it goin?"

Yule looked out of the corner of her eye, gaze almost narrowed at Jennsen before turning back to the guy.

"Relax. We were just gonna go have a little fun. You care to join the two of us?" he asked flirtatiously.

Jennsen was humming to The Temptations 'My Girl', eyes scanning over the crowd for hazel eyes.

No such luck.

"Sorry, but I don't share," the goth said with false sweetness. "Now scram, before I show you the true definition of a eunuch..." He didn't budge. Her expression turned menacing in an instant. "You wanna test me, short stuff?"

Jennsen was giggling over Yule's response, oblivious to her anger as the guy scowled. "She wasn't worth it, any way," he gritted out, eyes scanning over her with disinterest and annoyance. "And neither are you," he said before walking off grudgingly.

"Keep on walkin', itty bitty man," Yule taunted. Her eyes then turned to Jennsen, wide with alarm. "What the _hell_, Jen?"

"Huh?" Her eyes widened with innocence. "Why are you angry? We're just... What was the word?" She thought hard for a moment, expression brightening once she figured out what it was. "Talking!" She grinned in triumph. "Yeah, we were talking."

"Talking?"

"About kissing, in fact," she added, nodding wisely.

"How much have you been drinking?"

"Just a little." Jennsen shrugged.

"More than a little... Sleezy McSleezbag was taking advantage of you. You could've gotten in real trouble."

"That's why I have you here, Yollie."

Yule frowned. "I don't like that name. Never say it again."

"Yes, Yolanda."

Her eyes narrowed. "You want me to tell your parents you've been drinking?"

"Nonononono, they'll kill me if they find out!" Jennsen sort of cracked up laughing as she said that.

"Well that'd be very unchristian of them now, wouldn't it?"

"You," she said with raised eyebrows, poking Yule's shoulder clumsily. "Know what I mean."

"Yeah, yeah, I'll quit teasing you." A slow smile stole over her face. "But jeez, you're just so damn cute as a drunk."

"_You're_ just so damn cute as a drunk."

"I just said that."

"_You_ just said that." Giggle.

"All right, I think it's high time for you to get home and have some rest."

"But I have– I haven't finished talking to what–his–face...? Hey! Hey, guy! Where did he go?" She frowned, confused and almost alarmed. "Did you see him leave? What happened? Woah, is he like a magician or something?" Her eyes lit up at the thought. "That is soooo cooooool." Jennsen took a sip of her drink, discovering that it was empty. She lifted it over her head, peering at the empty cup. "Hey, my drink was full before. I swear it was." She looked around, startled to find that Yule was yanking on her wrist. "Can't I just get one more refill?"

"No," Yule stated stubbornly, dragging her out of the house.

"You wanted me to 'live', didn't you? I'm living. Stayin' alive!" Jennsen laughed at her lame joke, singing to The Bee Gees.

"Maybe bringing you here was a bad idea after all," the goth murmured.

She had no idea how right she was.

* * *

_Get ready for part two! And don't forget to please review! (total coincidence that it rhymed *coughcough*) ;)_


	4. Filler Inner – part two

_An early update. Well, early considering. lol_

_Thanks again, and enjoy part two! I had some fun writing it.

* * *

_

Chapter Three – Filler Inner (Part Two)

Yule stopped her car at the end of the street from Jennsen's house, turning down the radio a little. "You're sure you can make it to your house on your own?" she asked, eyebrows raised.

Jennsen snorted. "I _have_ lived there for over three years, y'know. I think I know howda get to my own place."

"Fine, fine. Suit yourself." Yule had that expression on her face; one that looked as though she had a feeling there was a world of trouble ahead. But Jennsen took no notice of it as she got out of the car and made her way to her home.

The journey from there got a little awry.

Everything was a blur, and she couldn't stop laughing. Her head felt as though it was floating on some other world, constantly buzzing.

But, somehow or other, she managed to reach the side gate of her house.

Her arm squeezed through the gap in the top of the gate, hand reaching for the lock further down. She pulled the lock free and pushed against the wooden gate to open it. It didn't budge. She rammed her body against it. It still didn't move. She tried again. And again. And, after the third time, it abruptly pushed open, causing Jennsen to yelp with surprise as she clung to the gate. It slammed against the wall, Jensen clinging fiercely to the other side like a baby monkey on its mothers back.

Jennsen snorted out a laugh, placing one foot back on the ground, then the other. She took her hands off of the gate, dusting her palms on the back of her jeans as she stumbled into the backyard.

That was when she tripped over the hose lying on the grass.

Jennsen rolled over onto her back, blinking up at the stars in the sky.

She struggled to get up, almost tripping over the water hose again, and bursting into laughter because of it. Realizing that she should keep quiet, Jennsen clamped her hands over her mouth to stifle the sound, wandering over to the glass door. Thankful that it wasn't locked, she slid it open and staggered in, forgetting to close the door behind her.

She was walking through the hallway when a voice yelled out from up the stairs.

Busted.

Her eyes grew wide and she ran back to the couch in the lounge room to the left, hiding behind it.

The stomping of feet grew louder as the person trudged down the stairs, then turning into the sound of slippers quickly skidding against tiles in the hallway. "Whoever you are, you better drop what you're doing and get outta _my_ house _right now_ before I call _the_ _police_!"

It was her mom.

Fearful, Jennsen timidly stood up, hands raised in surrender. "It's just me," she said in warning.

"Jennsen!" the lights clicked on. She squinted at the brightness, noticing that her mother was holding a baseball bat. "What in the world? I... Do you have any idea what time it is? I thought someone was burgling the house with all that ruckus you made!"

She wasn't that loud.

Was she...?

Her brother, Steve, had walked out of his room, ground floor, and past the hallway, rubbing his eyes as he heard the commotion.

Jennsen's lips pursed as she shrugged.

"Are you… drunk?" Her mother asked in horror, the bat in her hands dropping with a loud clang against the floor.

"No," she slurred, shaking her head defensively. She gripped the couch harder, feeling a little dizzy.

"Dude, she's waaaaassteeeeed," Steve drawled with an amused grin.

"Shuddup, Stevie Wonder," Jennsen snapped.

"Real mature, Jenny," he mocked.

"Go die."

He rolled his eyes. "Oh, record breaker right there."

"Steve, get back to your room. _Now_." It was the stern motherly voice that both Jennsen and Steve were familiar with.

"I always miss out on the fun," he muttered, gripping the hallway railing as he walked as slowly as possible back to his room.

"_Steve_."

"Okay, okay. Yeesh." He hobbled into his room quickly, the door still open by only a fraction.

"_Steven!_"

His door slammed shut, followed by a string of mutterings Jennsen wasn't able to decipher.

"_Jennsen Keller_," Her mom said, fury, astonishment, and concern filled in her eyes. "What happened to you?"

She rolled her eyes, mouth open as she let out a yawn. "It's really hot," she murmured to herself.

"Why? Why are you doing this to me?" Her mother received no answer from the question, serving to agitate her even more. "Wait till your father hears about this..." She paced the room, hand weaved into her hair in dismay. "He won't let you _leave_ this house!"

Jennsen hated that screeching tone her mom put on in distress, so she shushed her in response. Her arms flailed dismissively in her mother's direction as she said, "Go away."

"Don't you _dare_ say that to _your_ mother! You are acting _very_ irresponsibly."

"So? You're not very responsible if you– if you put well being of your_self_ over the well being of your kids!" She tried to say it loud enough, but her mother didn't seem to hear. All the time, she was talking over Jennsen, disregarding her opinions. _And she wonders why I don't bother talking to her?_ "You know what, forget it," she muttered, more to herself anyway, as she scrambled up the stairs.

"Come _back_ here right _now_!"

"Go to hell." Jennsen slammed her door.

Her mother appeared moments after, slamming the door shut behind her to resume the lecture.

Jennsen didn't know whether it was because she ran up the stairs too fast, but her stomach churned nauseously and her head was spinning. The sound of the door slamming echoed in her head, causing her to gag. She ran to her bin, clutching it to her face as she retched.

Needless to say, the arguing voice nearby stopped.

Her mother left the room without another word.

After hurling out the contents of her stomach, Jennsen passed out on her bed.

She would have some peace and quiet for the night. Until morning, when she had to go to school. When she had to leave the comfort of her room.

Then, all hell would break loose.

–

Jennsen vowed never to drink again. She walked along the Dillon High parking lot, head pounding in pain as though it was smashed with cleavers. Or clamped and scraped heavily against the cement. Either way, it hurt.

She flinched as she heard a car door slam shut, the jingle of merry keys accompanying it.

And fates be damned, it was Riggins standing beside his truck, hand bringing his bag strap over his shoulder.

Jennsen walked by quickly, hoping he wouldn't notice her. But hope wasn't on her side nowadays.

"The filler inner, right?"

She spun around at his question and rolled her eyes, immediately wincing after.

"Hungover much?"

She pursed her lips, too frustrated to answer.

"Why you here so late?"

Jennsen looked away with a sigh, eyes feeling like dead weight. "They wanted to spend more time arguing with me..." Her eyes shut as her brow scrunched, trying to suppress the pain inside her head unsuccessfully. "Figured letting me walk to school would teach me a lesson." She opened her eyes, expecting him to be grinning or laughing at her. Instead, he was watching thoughtfully. "You?"

His eyes looked to one corner of the ground as a smile curved at his lips "Oh, just studyin'." Really bad liar. She snorted faintly. His smile deepened as he tried not to laugh. "Yeah, I'm so gonna ace that bio test." He did the A-OK sign for good measure, mouth curled in a strange pout. She laughed, but then winced. "You really got smashed," he observed, humor lighting his eyes.

"Yep." Hefty sigh. "I should probably get to class now."

"Well, avoid the bells."

"I'll try to."

–

Jennsen covered her head between her folded arms on the cafeteria table, hunching her shoulders a little to muffle the sound around her. Being hungover sucked.

"Tim!" Zoey called out, most likely attracting attention from all the students. "Tim, over here!"

"_Shuuuut uuuuup _already," Jennsen groaned, trying to burrow her face further in her arms.

Yule laughed.

Jennsen was sure she could feel the glare on her for one moment.

"Hey Tim." Zoey's chirpy voice was extra chirpy today.

"Hey". Riggins sounded unimpressed. As usual.

"Here," Shuffle of papers. "It has a brief summary of the essay as well, so you can read through that just in case if the teacher or anyone else quizzes you."

"Thanks." An almost incoherent mumble.

"No problem. Need anything else, don't hesitate to ask." Zoey's voice lowered, trying to sound sultry but not quite on the mark.

"Wanna take my virginity as well?" Yule mocked in an airy, high pitched voice.

Jensen chuckled against her arms faintly, imagining the killer glare sent Yule's way.

"Hey, filler inner."

Realizing that Tim was talking to her, she frowned and looked up, wincing against the sudden harshness of light and sound.

He tossed a small square sized packet her way.

Dubiously, Jennsen grabbed the packet that landed on the table, turning it around to see the yellow Advil font printed on the cover.

_2 ibuprofen tablets, 200mg._

"Take this. It helps."

"O-kay…" She was meaning to say thank you, but when Jennsen looked up, all she saw was the back of his Panthers jersey as he walked away.

Silence dragged on for a moment until he was out of sight.

"What was _THAT_ all about?" Zoey screeched.

Jennsen looked helplessly at Yule, hands clutching her ears as she winced.

"Jen got a little drunk at the party," Yule mused, seeing her friend in a different light. "But after watching primate Riggins talking to ya, I'm guessing you were a lot more smashed than I thought."

"Yeah, well, he probably isn't interested," Zoey huffed, edge evident in her tone.

"Why look at that, she's glowing green."

Zoey growled at Yule, glaring between her and Jennsen before decapitating her salad with her plastic spork.

Tiffany, who was for the most part silent and observing, decided now was the best time to speak up, sounding terribly confused as she asked, "What's a 'filler inner'?"

Jennsen wanted to hit her head on the table, but thought better of it.

* * *

_So... thoughts?_


	5. We Never Change

_There's a ref for Steve now on my profile page, for your visual enjoyment. I think what sold me was the flannel. It's become a weakness of mine. ;)_

_Couldn't think of a title, and this one seemed fitting enough. We Never Change by Coldplay. Love the mood of it. Goes well with this chapter, methinks. Take a listen if you have the time._

* * *

Chapter Four – We Never Change

"_Come on," he ushered, hand wrapped around her wrist as he dragged her with him into the football field. "Imma show you how to make a _real_ football pass."_

_Jennsen snorted skeptically at her brother as they ran out into the deserted training grounds._

_The moon lit the field just barely, so Steve went out to the control room and switched on some of the floodlights. A moment later, he returned to the centre of the field. "Are you ready?" he asked with a confidant grin, tossing a football in his hand briefly._

_It was there that she'd first learnt how to throw a football. How to play like her brother._

_But it sure did take a while._

_He kept on telling her not to choke the ball when she'd throw it. Jennsen muttered back under her breath that she'd choke him if he didn't shut up. She knew by Steve's smirk that he heard what she'd said, but he still reminded her anyway and asked her to throw again._

_They spent lord knows how long on that field._

_Laughing. Chasing. Tripping. Throwing. Tackling._

_Eventually, Jennsen fell to a heap on the ground, exhausted._

_Steve sat down in turn, lying back against the grass._

"_What's it like?"_

"_Hmm?" His hands were behind his head as he gazed up at the stars._

"_Playing a football game..." Her arms were spread out, backs of her hands resting against the grass. Her head turned to glance his way, breathing still heavy from running. Steve didn't look worn out at all. "With the crowd and all."_

_It took him a moment to answer. "Real exciting, but real scary, too." He let out a breath, grin spreading on his face. "It's just... I feel like I can forget everything else, you know? Like there's nothin' for me to worry about. Like nothing else matters. It's just me and my goal: winning that game..." It was the first time she'd ever seen him that happy. Enthusiastic. There was this pride in his voice, like was living his dream. "I don't think I'd trade that for anything."_

"_Even me?" she asked with mocked pain and puppy dog eyes._

"_Heck no, you're annoying! I'm gonna be a pro football player, rich and famous, and you'll be working at some fast food joint."_

"_Shut up!" She grabbed the football near by and threw it at his head. He laughed as his hands quickly came up and dodged the ball from its target. "Besides, I won't even _need_ to work. You'll provide for me," she said with casual confidence._

"_You're so sure," Steve teased._

"_Mhmm. 'Cause I have all the dirt on you. Wouldn't want tabloids to get their hands on that, would ya?"_

"_You rat." He scowled, throwing the ball at her head this time._

_She laughed, more cackle than laugh, as she dodged out of the way._

_..._

It was Friday night when Jennsen called up Yule, asking for a lift. There was no pragmatic reason behind it, just a need to be away, to do something different. She snuck out of her house and got inside Yule's car.

Jennsen had told Yule about the trouble she was in, of her family problems, so the goth conceded without hesitation, driving them through the streets of Dillon with no words necessary. Jennsen stared off at the street lights and the neon signs through Yule's dusty car window. She ignored Yule's glances, knowing that although her friend was concerned, she didn't want to talk about it. She needed to think. She needed breathing space.

As Yule drove past the school, Jennsen asked if she could get dropped off near the football field.

"You sure?" Yule was in the habit of asking that a lot.

"Yeah. I'll call when I need to be picked up." Jennsen paused. "Thanks for doing this."

She knew Yule wasn't so sure about leaving her on her own, but Jennsen was in no mood to argue, and the goth could see that. "Well, take care of yourself. Call me when you need me."

With a solemn nod, Jennsen closed the door and made her way to the grounds.

It wasn't that same field in Austin, but it felt familiar enough.

She looked down at her chucks as she walked, hands dug deep into her pockets.

Breathing in the cold night air, she closed her eyes and almost saw herself in those bleachers back home, cheering her brother on from the crowd. The noise of cheers rang out in one incoherent form and when she opened her eyes it all faded away.

The silence surrounded her, but the energy was still there. Something tranquil, once all the screaming people were gone.

That was when she saw someone walking in the distance, pack of beer under one arm, football under the other.

The Dillon Panthers Fullback.

Jennsen had nowhere to hide so instead she waited for him to spot her, scatter-brained and thinking of what to say.

Tim noticed her instantly, walking up in languid steps; all relaxed, but with a sense of underlying strength. Purpose. It was hard to explain, but he had a saunter that gave away something about him, about his presence.

"Filler... Don't you read signs? Student's aren't s'posed to be out here after hours."

"Must be incompetent." She rolled her eyes. "Silly me."

He didn't reply. Judging by his blank expression, he mustn't have appreciated her tone.

Jennsen faltered, gaze darting around the field. "Sorry, I... It's been a bad week..." Her head hung down a little, eyes looking up at him from under her brow. "I wanted to say thank you." Her cheeks heated slightly, feeling more than uncomfortable. It didn't help when Tim was unabashedly staring at her. "I don't think I would've been able to go through the rest of the day. So... thanks."

The faintest smile tugged at his lips as he blinked languidly. "No biggie..."

Silence.

Jennsen didn't know what else to say, just stood there awkwardly.

"So..." The beguiling smile widened as Tim shifted the pack of beers under his arm. You out here stalking me, then?"

The blush increased. It served to amuse him. Until he saw the expression on her face.

"Came here to think." Jennsen blinked rapidly, hands coming behind her back to wrap around her wrists in a monkey grip. "Then I saw you walking in..." He watched her for a moment, until she thought she might blush even more and so she asked, "Why you here?"

Tim lifted the pack of beers under one arm slightly and gestured to the football held in his other hand. "Doing what I do best."

"That isn't what I heard you do best," she muttered.

"What?"

"Nothing," Jennsen dismissed quickly, but something about the light in his eyes and the smile he was fighting made it seem like he knew what she'd said. "I'll just let you do what you do best, then." It wasn't a teasing comment, more neutral; not laced with sarcasm like her usual remarks.

She turned, about to get out her phone and call Yule back.

"Hey..." She stopped at Tim's voice and turned back to glance at him. "You up for a beer?" he asked.

Jennsen looked down for a moment, taking a few breaths before meeting his eyes. "Well... I've already ruined my reputation with my parents." She shrugged, head titled to the side as she pondered briefly. "Might as well go for the W."

Tim grinned big. "Spoken like a champ."

–

They were both silent, drinking moderate amounts of beer at a time. Well, Jennsen was, at least. She wasn't sure what Tim's idea of 'moderate' was, but he was chugging cans of beer down with the ease of a pro... If anyone could be pro at drinking, anyway.

The silence brought about a sense of the familiar to her. It was a different sort of quiet, not like the type she'd encountered all too much at the family dinner table; forced and awkward. It was peaceful and lazy.

There wasn't any pressure.

It was nice.

"So," Tim began. "How's parental punishment goin' for ya?"

"Swell," Jennsen quipped with a chuckle before sighing. "Dad took it the worst sorta way. But mom's pretty stern, too. They have a set punishment for me: being grounded and going to church."

"That's evil."

"I know." She laughed more at his reply. "But I doubt they'll see it through. They're more concerned than angry. Besides, I usually stay inside my room anyway, so it's not really punishment."

"You're grounded, huh?" He raised an eyebrow, clueing on to the fact that she was out on a football field during the night and drinking beer with him.

Jennsen shrugged. "Doesn't mean I have to abide by it."

"Didn't think you'd have it in you."

"Yeah, well, you don't know what I have or haven't got in me," she said quietly, no venom in her voice. It was an observation more than anything. "You don't really know me."

"True."

The silence surrounded them once again.

Jennsen downed the rest of her beer, hoping it would keep her warm. Tim tossed another one her way the moment she was finished. She clicked it open, playing with the ring pull before taking another sip.

After sitting in the cold with her legs crossed for so long, the blood was lost from her limbs and the warmth from the alcohol hadn't kicked in. So with a stretch, Jennsen stood up from the ground and walked along the field, rubbing her hands together to create some form of warmth from the friction.

She looked up briefly at the stars and the moon, remembering lying on a football field far away with her brother. It felt like such a long time ago...

"Hey Filler!" His voice pulled her out of her thoughts and she turned around. Tim was standing now, football in his hand as he got ready to throw. "Think fast."

She saw the ball flying. It was a high throw more than a long one, so she didn't have to run that far back in order to reach it.

Jennsen caught the ball in her hands, jogging a little closer. "You ready?" she called out to him.

"You askin' me?" Tim called back mockingly.

She gave him a pointed look, though he probably couldn't see it from that far.

He put his hands in the air, pumping his fingers back in emphasis.

Jennsen gripped the ball lightly, making sure she wasn't choking it. Her hands were kinda small considering, but she managed to get her pinky and ring finger on the laces, her index finger stretching close to the point of the football.

With one fluid motion, she threw the ball back at him. It'd been a while since she'd played, but she got a neat spiral throw out of it.

His eyebrows raised as he caught the ball quickly. "Nice one." He wrapped his hand around the football, getting ready to toss it back. "You're good."

Jennsen didn't want to elaborate about her 'lessons' with her brother, but she didn't want to lie to Tim either. So she settled for a shrug, rolling up her jacket sleeves before the football spun her way, catching it with ease.

They threw the ball around, no words spoken. He'd throw a fast one at times, or a particularly long one, so she'd have to run for it. But she didn't complain, since she was trying to make it as difficult as possible for him to catch the ball as well.

Eventually, she got so annoyed with him that she ran up and threw the football at him on purpose, intending to hit him in the head. He laughed, hands blocking it from its goal as he backed up a couple of steps.

Giddy with laughter and alcohol, Jennsen ran over to the goalpost where their drinks were before slumping to the ground in exhaustion.

He jogged towards her leisurely, crouching down to finish off the rest of his beer.

"So, is this all that consists of you're life? Football and beer?" She refrained from adding 'and girls'.

He sat down then, grabbing another beer from the pack and pulling the ring back with a loud click. "Why the sudden interest?"

Jennsen decided to go with her instinct.

Or maybe it was the alcohol kicking in.

"There's a lot they say about you... I'm just trying to sort out the myth from fact." Tim took a sip from the can, waving his free hand in the air to show that he was comfortable for her to continue. Jennsen let in a slow breath before beginning, "They say you're a player, outside of football." He raised his eyebrows, lips pursed as he swallowed the rest of the alcohol. "Judging by all the boasting rally girls, I'd say that's a fact." His mouth twisted into a boyish smile at that. "They say you're a drinker…" She looked at the ground, littered with empty cans. "Should be about right."

"You gonna lecture me about what other people say?"

"There's one thing I'm curious about…" Jennsen looked down, too nervous to gauge his reaction. "They say you like to hurt people when you play out on that field... but even more when you're not. And that you don't listen; that you'll break someone and not even care that you did, no matter how many lectures you get. That it still won't reach you..." Jennsen composed herself, voice taking on a lighthearted tone as she rambled, "But you're conversing with me – and I'm not exactly your type of girl, which means I don't think there's any ulterior motive – so I'd say that you're listening, which is something."

"You got me all figured out, haven't you?" Tim mocked, but the edge wasn't evident in his voice. It was in his eyes. "Like Einstein reincarnate. You're just so damn smart, huh?"

"Smarter than you," she replied back casually, expression deadpan.

"Ouch. That hurt. Like, _deep_." His sarcasm was more than dry.

"It's true, though... But you could be..." His brow furrowed as he gave her a questioning glance. Jennsen continued, "Smarter than me." Tim huffed his disagreement. "You could..."

"Yeah." His lips pressed together to hold back an amused smile.

"All you need is to fix your eye on that goal, like you would do a ball or a target." Jennsen drew her legs to her chest, wrapping her arms around them. "Then just go for it. I know it isn't always that easy, but hey, I'm always here if you need help."

"Help...?" His eyes met hers.

She looked down at her knees, suddenly bashful. "With school work... I'm not gonna give you all the answers, per se, but I can be there to help you along."

"You serious?"

Jennsen looked up at him and nodded.

"Why?"

"Consider it recompense for being a…" She rolled her eyes, not being able to find a better term, "Bitch." He smirked at the word. "I didn't mean to laugh at you, or act so mean to you. Just, wrong place, wrong time, kinda deal."

"I've had worse."

Jennsen watched him, curious.

"You ever spoken to my ex girlfriends before?" Tim asked with a smile.

She laughed.

* * *

_Any thoughts as to where this story is headed? Any comments in general? I'd love to know, so drop me a line. I'd appreciate it._


	6. Clear Eyes

_Thanks for sticking by, folks. Just a heads up; this chappie is written all in Tim's pov and follows on from the end scene in the previous chapter. Thanks go out to Lucklily, for putting up with my worrying over these past chapters. I get nervous that I'm not writing the canon characters well enough. =\_

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Chapter Five – Clear Eyes

It was close to midnight when she'd gotten a call.

By the wince on her face, and the way she pulled the phone further away from her ear, Tim could tell it was one of her parents.

Once she hung up her phone he decided to ask, "You need a ride back?"

He wasn't even sure how she got here.

He wasn't about to let her walk back on her own.

"Umm..."

"It's not like we're getting married, filler."

She rolled her eyes, blushing slightly. "No, uh..."

"You got caught," he filled in.

"Yep." She sighed. "My mom's going to take me back home. No questions asked."

"How'd you get here anyways?"

"Yule..." Weird name. His browed furrowed, confused. "Y'know, the goth chick?" His eyes flashed with recognition. "But thanks for asking."

He nodded.

She sat back down.

"I didn't catch your name," he said, chancing a glance at her.

She blinked at him for a while before answering, "Jennsen."

"Jennsen, huh?" he smiled a little, sipping his beer before adding, "Still prefer filler inner."

"Thought you would," she sighed, but there was a hint of a smile on her face.

He took another drink, letting the silence settle before he asked, "You play before?"

She caught on to what he was asking more quickly than anticipated. "What, you mean Powder Puff?" Her face twisted into a sour expression. "Ugh, lord no."

"Then what?"

"...My brother used to play." She had a quiet tone about her, the sort that he'd have about his parents.

He decided not to press any more, instead, changing topics. "Wait, what've you got against Powder Puff?"

She glanced at him, eyebrow quirked. "Everything."

"I think it's great."

"Figures," she muttered, shaking her head.

"What's that tone supposed to mean?" His brow scrunched, incredulous. "It gives gals a chance to play, what's wrong with that?"

"Well the least they could do was make up a better name for it."

"...Okay, I give." He chuckled a little. "That's true."

She nodded away, eyes cast upwards to the stars. She did that a lot, he noticed.

It didn't take long for her phone to buzz again. Jennsen had a small smirk on her face as she let it hang, answering on the fifth ring. "Yeah..." She paused, listening to whoever was on the other line. "The zipper was jammed. I couldn't get it outta my jacket pocket sooner, that's all." Tim held back a laugh. She'd thought it through. "I'm not using a tone, Mom." She rolled her eyes. "Okay, in a couple of minutes. I'll see you then." She hung up, glancing at him as she stood. "Gotta start walking out now."

He nodded.

She snorted lightly as she looked at the ground. "But it sure is tempting."

"What is?"

"If she sees me out here with alcohol and a jock." A smirk broke out. "I think she might have a heart attack..." Jennsen's grin faded. She gnawed on her lower lip briefly before meeting his gaze. "Thank you... for just..." She shook her head, unable to think of the right words to say. "Yeah... thank you." He could see the sincerity in her eyes, one that was stronger than words.

"You're welcome."

With a tightlipped smile she walked off, hands dug into her pockets.

Sometimes, he wished he'd had parents that were like hers, even if it meant being grounded for some reason or other. It seemed normal, natural. He didn't have much of a normal family; didn't have much of a family to begin with. But he was glad to have Billy sticking with him through the tougher times. The only difference was he wasn't sure who was sticking by Jennsen.

"Hey, filler," he called. She turned around, expression questioning. "No regrets, 'kay?"

She nodded with understanding and turned back around.

Jennsen was different from other girls. Amusing, to say the least. Like the little sister he never had.

He supposed that was why he could talk to her more, tease her.

He didn't know her, but she sure knew him.

Tim supposed that that was no big surprise, being the Fullback of the Dillon Panthers; tagged as one of them 'wild Riggins boys'.

But the surprising part was that he'd managed to talk with someone he hadn't even known all that long.

And she was a girl.

He hadn't dealt with talking to a girl all that often. Most of the time they were preoccupied with things that didn't exactly require talking. And if they did talk, it was the sparring before hand; flirting in the halls or giving him their numbers.

There was no flirting with this gal, no ulterior motive behind her words. She was just plain old curious.

Suddenly, the decision to turn down party invites after their Panther victory just hours ago seemed worth it. Tim was thinking too much about the game, thinking too much about the past. He wasn't in the mood for drinking games with his teammates or some 'good times' with the rally girls.

Surprisingly enough, he found that he had more fun with Jennsen than he'd had in the long run with rally girls recently. And that was saying something.

But it wasn't all her, either. After what happened with Lyla...

Tim let out a huge breath, eyes defeated.

He couldn't get his head straight. Lyla was the best thing he'd ever had, and it wasn't just about the sex. He thought it was, but it wasn't. Whenever she lectured him, he'd come back ten times more determined. Whenever she'd tell him to go away, he kept coming back for more. She motivated him more than Coach ever had.

But Lyla didn't get that. She never had. She was like an angel to him, and just thinking that, he had to refrain from rolling his eyes. But that was seriously the only term he could find to describe her. She was the closest thing to pure he would ever get; the only person that wasn't as fucked up as him and everyone else in his life. How could he not want to have that kind of girl by his side?

But then again, how could Lyla want to be by _his_ side?

Jesus was her kinda man.

And he seemed more like the devil.

Tim looked up at the starry sky, downing the rest of his beer.

–

"Here you go," the rally girl said with a sickly sweet smile, holding a cookie near Brooks face playfully.

"Thanks." The jock grinned, taking a bite out of the cookie.

"You eat them all up, ya hear?" she said, handing Brooks a tupperware container filled with the rest of the baked treats. "Got plenty more where they came from."

"No doubt," he said, giving her a once over. The rally girl turned and sauntered off, knowing that he was watching her every step.

"See, that's the thing," Landry began, garnering the other jocks attention on the table. "I'm on the team and I still don't get any cookies."

"You're on the bench, Lando," Tim said, taking a drink from one of those small cafeteria milk cartons.

"But there was that one time–"

"Yeah, yeah, and Riggins is a virgin." The guys laughed at Smashes joke. "Yo Riggs, you landed that girl Zoey yet?" Brian gestured to the girl at the other end of the cafeteria with the chirpy voice, the one that'd been hassling him for the past couple of weeks. "'Cause the Smash can help you out, if you don't wanna get your hands dirty."

"Go for your life, Two-Zero," Tim said, hiding a smile as he shook his head. "Go for your life."

"That other girl sitting near her is pretty hot, too," Bradley commented.

"What, the emo one?" They all burst out laughing from Brooks comment. "That's a scary chick right there."

"Who ya talkin' 'bout, Firecrotch?" Tim asked before downing the rest of his drink.

"The quiet one."

"You mean Jennsen?" Saracen said. Tim's eyes snapped to the Quarterback's at her name. "She's in my art class."

"QB1 does art," Santiago mused.

"Yeah, not like you haven't reminded everyone the past _hundred_ times or anythin'," Matt mumbled wryly.

"So what's she like, Saracen?" Smash asked for the fun of it.

"Oh, she's uh, she's nice."

"Nice? _Bo–ring_ answer..." Brian shook his head in disappointment. A sly smile showed as he looked at the Fullback. "What do you think, Riggs?"

He wasn't about to spill to the boys about what'd happened that Friday night. Something about it seemed too personal; like they'd made a truce between one another, off the record.

With finality, Tim folded his arms, resting them against the table as he leaned forward. "She looks cute," he observed with a shrug, head tilted slightly.

"Too innocent for you."

"Doesn't mean I can't think she's cute, Williams," Tim countered, not bothering to give his teammate a glance as he grabbed the apple on his tray and took a bite. "What do you think, Seven?" He asked Matt through the mouthful of apple.

"Well... Yeah, she's cute, I guess."

A chorus of 'Oooooh's' sounded from the group.

"What? Why'd you do that to me and not Riggins?" Tim smirked at the Quarterback, raising his eyebrows and shrugging as he chewed. "There is such a thing as an observation y'know," Matt defended hurriedly. They weren't hearing a word of it. "What, you saying she isn't cute?"

"Naw, Matty, I'm just saying that she's your type of girl." Matt looked away, shaking his head as Smash teased, "Saracens got a crush y'all."

"No." The Quarterback slumped in his chair, expression a little sullen. "I'm not that interested in girls right now," he mumbled.

The guys couldn't really voice anything around the Coach, but they all knew how hung up he was after the fiasco with Julie and then that nurse Carlotta. It was still a sore spot for their QB. They all felt bad for him.

Tim's eyebrows quirked. "Brokeback, dude."

The group burst into laughter, tension dispelling from the air at the Fullback's quip.

"You on top or bottom?" Brooks teased.

"You know what, I consider that particularly offensive," Landry began in that mature, conversational tone that no one took seriously. "I understand that you're obviously falling into that jock-like masculine persona, but there's no need to–"

"Call your wife back, Matty," Smash said.

"I am not his wife," Landry defended, ignoring the bursts of laughter around him. "We have a very platonic relationship, Matthew and I..."

Tim shook his head with a smile, eyes locking with Lyla's. His smile faded. She retracted her gaze quickly, putting her tray away before leaving the cafeteria.

He stood from his seat and left without a word to the boys.

They were used to him doing that by now.

He chucked his half eaten apple in the trash before pushing through the double doors. "Lyla," he called out, catching up to her. "Lyla, wait," Tim said, moving in front of her to stop her.

She side stepped to move around him, but he blocked her way again. "Tim, please don't."

He shook his head incredulously. "Why can't you talk to me for just two seconds?"

"There's nothing to talk about."

"Well I kinda think there is."

Lyla looked away, sighing out of long suffering before meeting his eyes as they both moved to the side of the hallway. "You do, do you?" She folded her arms, brow furrowed. "Okay, about what?" she asked, peering up at him with her chin held high. "About those brief moments we spent together that long time ago; when we were both hurting over someone we loved?"

It was Tim who looked away this time, his jaw clenched.

"I feel like I have to _drill_ it into your head..." Lyla shook her head, staring at him in pity. "I've moved on Tim, why can't you?"

He looked back at her, staring her right in the eyes as he murmured, "I told you..."

Her gaze was guarded. "How could I ever believe that coming from you? You drink, you sleep around, you don't even do your own homework." Her words were like venom. "You're a _mess_, Tim. I doubt you even know what love means," she said cynically.

He wasn't fazed by her response and didn't beat around the bush as he asked, "Do you love him?"

She blinked, caught of guard by the question. "Tim–"

"Answer me, Garrity."

"...Yes."

He could tell in her eyes that she didn't mean it. "C'mon now..." A crooked smile showed on his lips as his head tilted. "Lyin' is a sin, I thought you knew that much."

Her eyes hardened, brow furrowed. "You're a jerk."

"Hey Tim, Lyla, how y'all doing?"

Lyla blinked, turning around and mustering a smile at the Coach's wife. "Uh, great, Mrs... Mrs. Taylor," she replied with false cheer.

"Great," Tim echoed, still watching her. Lyla fidgeted under his gaze.

Tami looked between the two. "Sorry if I'm bothering you, Lyla, but is it alright if I have a talk with Tim for a moment?"

"No, no, that's fine. I was just about to go anyway." Lyla looked down, avoiding his gaze the whole time. "Bye."

He watched her walk away.

"Tim?"

He tore his eyes away, seeing a stern look on Mrs. T's face that seemed familiar.

It reminded him of Coach's reaction one time when he arrived late to practice, completely hammered.

Mrs. Taylor was holding up a paper.

It was the English lit. essay he had that chirpy girl write out for him. He didn't realize he got an A+ for it.

And he'd forgotten to read the summary she'd given him as well.

"Mind telling me what's in this essay?" Mrs Taylor asked disappointedly, catching on to the fact that it wasn't his own work.

Shit.

–

He was slammed back onto the ground, air knocked out of his lungs with the blow.

A whistle blew and the football players groaned and sighed with relief, already worn out from practice. They weren't even half way through yet.

"Get your ass up now, Riggins!"

Tim stumbled to his feet as he slipped off his helmet, brow scrunched and breathing labored. His body buzzed with pain, exhaustion, heat, alcohol, and lack of sleep all at once. He was more than used to the feeling by now.

"Tim, get over here," Coach ordered. "Everyone else, go get some water."

Tim placed his hands on his hips, taking in huge breaths as he walked to his Coach.

Coach Taylor took off his sunglasses, gaze settled on his Fullback.

"I've been told a few things by Mrs. Taylor." Tim's eyes faltered to the ground before returning to the Coach's once more. "Now, I don't know what's goin' on with you, but whatever it is, you need to sort it out." He fixed Tim one of those unnerving expressions, lips pursed in a frown. "It's affecting your life, it's affecting your attitude, and it's affecting your game. So get some help, son. And I'm not talkin' 'bout rally girls doing your homework. It's okay to have assistance once in a while, but it doesn't mean you have to resort to that." Coach Taylor paused, letting the words sink in. "Am I understood?"

"Yes, Sir."

"Good." He clapped him on the shoulder briefly. "Now get back on the field." Tim nodded as the Coach blew his whistle. "Okay, ladies, we're doing it again." A chorus of groans sounded but were immediately silence by Coach's glare. "Quit your whinin'! If one of you stuff up, you _all_ stuff up. We are in this together, that's what makes us a team. So if y'all want to win, you work together and start acting like a team. You here me?"

"Yes, Coach," the team chorused.

"I said do _you all hear me_?"

"Yes, Coach!"

"Now do it again!"

As Tim slipped on his helmet, rolling his shoulders to loosen up the tense muscles there, he heard her a familiar voice echo words of confidence in his head...

_All you need is to fix your eye on that goal, like you would do a ball or a target. Then just go for it. I know it isn't always that easy, but hey, I'm always here if you need help..._

He thought maybe the alcohol was making him hear voices or something, but if it was, he didn't care. He was seeing everything with clear eyes now and he knew what to do.

Tim slipped on his mouth guard, teeth clenched and gaze determined as he crouched into position on the field, ready for the play.

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_It was fun writing with Landry. So stoked that he'll be a regular in the 4th season. As well as Tim of course; no brainer. :P Hoping for more of the Riggs brothers in the next season. I love those two!_


	7. Full Hearts

_I know it's been an incredibly long time since I've updated this story. So long that I dread checking to see when my last update was. I hit a lot of snags with this fic, but I managed to sort a few of them out. So if you're still here, thank you._

_Starting off with a flashback, and then some changes in POV after. You are forewarned.

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Chapter Six – Full Hearts

"_Hi Mr. and Mrs. Keller! Hey Jenny."_

_She pulled a false smile at her brother's girlfriend, Penny. "It's Jennsen," she corrected._

_The girl didn't even bat an eye at the feigned sincerity. "How do you think your bro's going to go in the big game?" she asked._

"_Oh, W," Jennsen replied, ill amused and matter of fact. "All the way."_

_Penny laughed a high pitch laugh that made Jennsen cringe. "You're just sooo cute."_

_What else could there be but cute?_

_Her eyebrow quirked at the remark, eyes filled with attitude. Steve cleared his throat and gave Jennsen a look, one that told her that she should at least try to make an effort._

_The other eyebrow raised with it as she looked away, wondering how her brother saw anything special in Penny._

"_So, uh..." Mr. Keller began, clearing the awkward air. "How're you feeling, Steve?"_

"_Ready."_

_Dad nodded his approval before clapping him on the shoulder. "Use them legs, son. I know they'll get you out of anythin'."_

"_Will do."_

_Mom placed a kiss on Steve's cheek. "We'll be cheering for you."_

_Steve looked back at his little sister. "Wish me luck, Jenny."_

"_Like you need it," she said as she folded her arms, giving him a sidelong glance. Mom gave Jennsen the pointed look and she sighed, "Fine, good luck."_

_He grinned. "We better head out."_

"_Yeah, don't wanna be late. Bye y'all!" Penny beamed, wrapping an arm around Steve's waist as they walked to his car._

"_I don't know what he sees in her," Dad muttered, folding his arms._

"_Ssh!" Mrs. Keller scorned, noticing her daughter snorting with laughter._

"_It's true, though," Jennsen defended through the duration of laughter._

"_I think she's quite lovely." The statement from her mom came out like more of an accusation._

"_Oh yeah," Jennsen nodded, overly enthusiastic. "Quite _lovely_ indeed."_

_Erica sent Jennsen a look of chastisement, followed a similar look directed towards her husband and the grin threatening to spread on his face._

_They watched Steve's car as he drove away._

_They didn't know this would be his last game._

–

_She hated the strange presence she felt in hospitals. Empty but full. Empty in the sense that people would come and go, whether they lived to walk out those hospital doors or die and get carried out in coffins._

_And full in the sense that lives would begin here. Mothers would ride through hormonal roller coasters to get to this point and fathers would be pacing and biting their nails, awaiting for the new life that would come into their world. Or maybe she was just going too far into the stereotype._

_But it was full also in the sense that, no matter what, people would always be sick or injured or in need of assistance. And when that time came around, they'd be here. This place that was a symbol of life and death; reminiscent of both poignant and joyful occasions._

_The contradiction itself was rather bewildering, once Jennsen got to thinking about it._

_And it was at this point that she wished there was an off switch to stop her mind from working._

_She felt a headache coming on, but even still, she thought about everything and anything._

_Especially her family. Individuals in general._

_It was easy to assume that when people are put under a certain amount of pressure they'd handle it in different ways. Same hearts that beat, but all different at heart._

_Jennsen sat in the hospital chair, playing with some surgical gloves that the nurse handed her._

_She pulled the glove tightly before letting it go with a loud snap._

_Penny had run away, crying. Dad switched from standing up to sitting down every couple of minutes, all the while quiet and waiting. Mom was off somewhere, talking to everyone and anyone about what happened, just to get some hope and reassurance that Steve was going to be fine._

_When the doc's said it was okay for all the family to go in and see Steve, that's when her mother put on the waterworks._

_There was a lump in Jennsen's throat and her eyes hurt so bad, but she didn't cry. She only glanced at her brother occasionally, knowing that each time she did nothing was going to change._

_He would still be unconscious, lying in a hospital bed that other injured or sick people had lied in. There was bound to have been someone that died in _that same bed_ and just the thought of it made her cringe._

_She hated when her head got stupid little thoughts like that; ones that made her sick and guilty. Like pondering the idea of someone close to her dying. She hated the idea of it, but she thought about it anyway. Was ashamed to admit that to herself, too._

_Most of the time she'd stare at the window sill, listening to her parents murmuring to one another or speaking with the doctors or nurses._

_They went home once it got dark._

_Mrs. Keller placed the keys on the side table, quiet. Her shoulders were shaking._

"_Mom...?"_

_Erica looked up and Jennsen could see the tears welling in her bloodshot eyes._

_Robert wrapped an arm around his wife, face expressionless, save for the furrow in his brow. "It'll be alright, hon. He'll be alright."_

_Mom wiped her hands over her face, trying to keep calm. It made her cry even more._

_Jennsen walked to her room, wanting to get away from it all._

_She heard her mom's voice as she stepped inside her room._

"_My poor baby." Her voice trembled as she sobbed out the words. It had finally sunk in. "Please, God, don't take my baby's legs away."_

_Jennsen closed the door behind her._

_..._

Yule said she had enough of the dweebs giving her strange looks in the library and had taken off. So that left Jennsen on her lonesome. And in her lonesome she pondered and dwelled.

She immediately regretted going out to that field on Friday. Sure, with the alcohol kicking in, she rambled on without a second guess. But now the aftermath was sinking in. She'd said way too much; known way too much. And Riggins knew nothing about her at all. How creepy was that? The only hope she had was that he was too drunk to remember, but since he was drunk all the time she couldn't count on him to forget everything.

And then there was the outreach offer. She wasn't sure why she volunteered to help him. Part of it, she knew, was because she felt bad for being mean to him, and also because it was just a way of getting her apology through to him. But the other part was something different entirely. A feeling of doubt nagging away at her.

It took a lot longer for her to figure out...

It was his heart.

She realized that just like any other person, he had his moments. He could be a genuine good guy if he wanted to be. Even if people called him a royal screw up; he had a good heart.

And that was worth more than any self proclaimed saint of Dillon.

The sound of a chair scraping against the floor brought her out of her thoughts.

She looked up, seeing the jock that'd been plaguing her mind since Friday.

At the quizzical expression on her face, Tim replied, "You said you could help me. Here I am." He sat opposite of Jennsen, facing her as he placed his bag on the table.

"This isn't some... practical joke that I'm not in on, is it?" She had a right to be skeptical.

"Just like the idea of bein' smarter than you."

She refrained from rolling her eyes. "Honestly."

"Honestly? Mrs. T. busted me again. With that paper I had... umm..." He faltered at the name.

"Zoey?"

"Yep, that girl," Tim replied unabashedly. "Anyway, Mrs. Taylor told Coach and now he's grilling me in practice."

"So... nothing out of the usual...?" Tim gave her a look. Jennsen smiled with the words, "What? It's a fair call."

He budged, looking away with a tight lipped smile of his own. "Right."

"Well then, what's the trouble?"

"Everything," Tim breathed out. She laughed. "Don't laugh, I'm serious." But he was grinning as he said it.

Jennsen let out a martyred sigh in return. "What's causing you the most grief, then?"

He shook his head, eyes narrowed slightly, lips upturned in thought.

"That's not a good sign."

A chuckle (or was it a giggle? did guys giggle anyway?) bubbled through at the look of distress on her face; the type that read along the lines of 'what have I gotten myself into?'. "Uh," Tim took in and let out a huge breath in contemplation. "English lit, I guess."

"Have any notes from class?"

"Should do," he mumbled, pulling the strap of his bag towards him, unzipping it and pulling out various crumpled photocopied sheets and a booklet.

She rifled through them. "I know your class is studying a different book from mine," she murmured quickly. "Yule mentioned it to me a while ago, but luckily I've already read it." She found a booklet about Oscar Wilde and flicked through it. "You've got summary notes? Wow. My teacher didn't even give me any of those for Goethe. And there's techniques on the structure, too. Geez, that'd make it a lot easier to find examples for your essay. I wish I had those. Faust is killing me right now."

He met her eyes, looking a little helpless and overwhelmed. Too much rambling.

"Alright, I'll slow down."

"Thank you."

She couldn't help but smile. "Okay, let's start from here..."

–

Tim's head was whirling with information he wasn't sure what to do with. But she'd helped some. Jennsen didn't make him feel dumb when he said he didn't understand, she just kept on explaining until it made sense. And when it finally did, she didn't jump with joy, or praise the lord that he finally figured it out, she just nodded and went on to a new topic.

Tim thought he might've seen her around some, during his junior years in Dillon High. He remembered her being introduced in an assembly with a couple of other newbies at school. But she was just a face he couldn't name at the time. And those early years went by like a blur.

Two weeks ago he hadn't even known her and now here he was, learning from her.

She was sweet. All innocent and stuff. But he could see a mean streak in her. Some hidden fire beneath those eyes.

She'd look away whenever he stared too long at her. It was kinda amusing, the way she got fidgety and all. But it got old quick once he realized how slow time was passing.

Tim let out a breath, stretching and glancing at the clock briefly. Then the person that'd been plaguing his thoughts for so long walked in. Their eyes locked, like they always did, and she looked away, like she always did, pretending she hadn't even seen him. His gaze followed Lyla every step of the way until she was out of sight.

_Damn..._

_She still looked good._

Jennsen watched as Tim's eyes zoned in on her. Lyla Garrity. And there was no denying, he wanted her. Hell, probably even loved her. Other flings would be tossed aside for newer flings. But the fact that Tim wanted more from Lyla meant something.

Once Garrity was out of his line of vision, his gaze wandered back to Jennsen. He didn't bulk under the look she gave him as she gestured with her chin to the notes in front of him.

"Come on, I mean..." He glanced over at where Lyla had once been before looking back at Jennsen.

She looked down at her work, shaking her head nonetheless.

"Hey... you're a smart girl, right?"

She glanced up at him from under her brow. "Compared to most of the girls you've been with; yeah, I'd say so."

"You are just such a sweetheart," he said dryly.

Jennsen rolled her eyes with a slight smile. The amusement in her expression faded when she saw the look on his face.

"I need some advice…"

He told her about Lyla. Much of the information she already knew (no wonder with Tiffany and Zoey being the queens of gossip), but she didn't interrupt him and listened quietly. It was interesting to see things from his perspective; different. Considering how unknown she was within the grade, he probably assumed she wouldn't tell. But the thought of him trusting her felt kinda flattering.

"So that's why you're doing that radio talk show, huh?"

He shrugged. "I was bored."

"Bored of her not noticing you?" He didn't meet her eyes, not willing to acknowledge what she said. "Are you happy with her?"

"I don't know." His head ducked. He met her eyes after a while, looking serious. "Define your idea of happy."

Wow... something about his gaze was unnerving. Guarded, but intense.

"Hmm. Let me put it in football scope... When you're out on the field, playing a game, and all those problems, worries and regrets just fade away... do you feel like that when you're around Lyla?"

He looked down. There was a beguiling look lighting his eyes. "...Yeah. I do."

She gave a small smile. "Then fight for her."

He pondered that thought for a moment before nodding, a twist of a grin on his lips now.

And just when she was getting back to her work he asked, "Did your brother teach you?"

Jennsen let out a frustrated breath before looking up. "What?"

"How to play?" She didn't budge with an answer. "I know a good arm when I see one," Tim commented, leaning forward on the table, arms crossed.

She sunk further in her chair, elbow resting on top of the back of the seat. "I don't see why it's so important to you. I mean, football's just a game for losing braincells."

He grinned. "That ain't the only thing you lose."

Her face scrunched up at the double meaning. "Real nice, Tim."

"Seriously, though. Tell me."

Jennsen looked down. "Yeah, he taught me."

"Something happened...?"

She swallowed. "Yeah..."

The silence that surrounded them both was deafening.

After a moment, Tim conceded with a brief nod and said, "Alright."

He was about to flick through the booklet on Wilde before she spoke suddenly, drawing his attention back on her.

Considering he'd just opened up to her, Jennsen figured it was only fair of her to do likewise.

"My brother loved football; he played Tailback. They used to call him 'Road Runner'." She smiled at that, and Tim smiled a little with her. "He was the greatest asset of the team. An amazing player. But it wasn't just in the game. He was a smart student, too. We were real competitive with our grades..." Her smile waned. "Anyway, one night the game got rough and he injured himself real bad. His right leg was left permanently damaged. Doctors said it could've been worse, y'know. But to my parents," she shook her head mockingly. "There was nothing worse than that. The accident ended it all for Steve. The coach had to take him off the team, since he couldn't play anymore."

Tim watched her, not knowing what to say.

"He had plenty of other career opportunities, other than football. But after that, his will just slipped away. He lost everything. His dream, friends, girlfriend. Penny didn't want to have to provide for a cripple. His teammates didn't want to be reminded, almost like he was bad luck to the team. Sure, he had friends who stuck by him. But everything was so different and Steve felt like they were trying too hard to help him. Like he was weak or like they felt guilty and sorry for him. He just lost it. And it was all because of some stupid sport."

She looked up at him, steel in her eyes. "You spend most of your life training for one single moment. A couple of hours on a field. Do you get anything out of it? Have you helped someone in need? Have you contributed to the greater society? No. All you end up with is a win, tie or loss, get smashed at some party, sleep with some rally girl, and not remember a thing in the morning."

She looked down, glare directed to the table. "Then there's the injuries. Y'all jocks seem to believe that you're untouchable. But you aren't. All it takes is _one mistake_ and you could lose your future in football forever. And then what do you do? Most guys like you don't even have backup plans. But that's Texas for ya, revolving around football and nothin' else."

Silence settled as Jennsen realized the impact of those thoughtless and rash words, surprised by the bitter anger in her voice. "So..." She swallowed, taking in the quiet for a moment as she hesitantly met his eyes. "Did I hit the nail on its head?"

"You don't always forget what the sex is like."

She rolled her eyes, hand covering her forehead as she stared down at her paper.

Trust Tim to say that, after everything.

"But you're right," he said. Jennsen looked up. "Guys like us don't have back up plans... But I think..." He paused, lips pursed pensively. "I think if we did, we'd be too easy on ourselves. Knowing that each game you play is risky, that one day it'll be your last; it sends a different kinda thrill through you. Makes the game even better."

Jennsen pulled her hand away as she shook her head, exasperated. "That's like adrenaline junkie gone borderline masochistic."

He shrugged. "It's what keeps me going. Nothing else matters when I'm playing. It's just me and the field."

She blinked rapidly at his comment. "You almost sound like Steve."

"He sounds like a cool guy."

Jennsen had a sad smile on her face. "He was..." She pressed her lips, holding back something. After a moment of hesitation, she added, "You don't realize people change until you see a thing like this happen to them. And when it does, you find any way to blame yourself for it."

Tim swallowed, clearing his throat a little. "Uh, were you there when Street...?" he trailed off with the question, unable to speak the rest.

"Yeah. I didn't see it, but I heard about it."

"I didn't even visit him..." He looked down at the desk, playing with the pencil on the table. "For _six_ weeks. And I was screwing his girl right behind his back." He blinked quickly, face expressionless. "But that's me, Riggs the coward; always have been, always will be." He seemed to be reliving the memories with those words.

"...I haven't gone to a game since."

He looked up, meeting her eyes.

Differences aside, there was something they shared in that gaze.

Through all the problems they both faced, they realized they weren't alone.

After a moment, they both looked away, no more words said or questions asked.

* * *

_Still interested?_


	8. Can't Lose

_Thanks so much for sticking by! It's been slow going with this story, I know, but I'm getting there. Little by little._

_Translation for Spanish dialogue is in the author's note at the end (you'll know when you get to it).

* * *

_

Chapter Seven – Can't Lose

A week had passed. They hadn't spoken since then. Tim kept his distance.

Jennsen didn't ask him why. She didn't nod at him in hello if he was walking past her in the hallway at school. Didn't so much as dare to look him in the eyes.

She wasn't much for confrontation.

After that talk in the library, Jennsen wondered whether she'd shared too much information. She wondered whether Tim felt like he'd shared too much with her as well.

Then she realized she was thinking about it too much and, assuming that he (most likely) wasn't thinking about it at all, decided it was best to forget whatever had happened between them.

Then, on Wednesday afternoon, all of the sudden, he came up to her and asked her for favors. With Bio and English and making excuses to teachers about why he hadn't shown up for class.

She wondered if he was half drunk when he asked her. Or hungover.

She couldn't really tell.

And the only thing that made her say yes was pity.

Because in her eyes, she didn't see Tim staring at her.

She saw someone else entirely.

–

There was a knock at the door. "Jennsen?" Her dad called out.

He must have just gotten back from work.

And seen the light on from under her door.

"Yeah."

The door opened. "Honey, it's 3 o' clock. You really need to get some sleep."

"I'm almost done," Jennsen murmured, crossing out a mistake she'd made.

"Well you can work on this later, once you've had some rest."

"It's due tomorrow, first thing in the morning. If I don't finish it now I'll loose twenty percent of my overall grade."

"Haven't you had plenty of time to get it done? I thought teachers gave two weeks notice."

"She did, I've just been busy with other subjects." The talking was really beginning to irritate her. She felt sick to the stomach and just wanted to get her work done.

"Jennsen–"

"I can't..." Her voice shook and she paused with frustration, her jaw clenched. "I _need_ to get this finished right now, _okay_?"

The silence from her father spoke more than words ever could.

Jennsen didn't look in his direction, continuing to read through her paper.

The door clicked close and she stopped, lower lip bitten and brow scrunched as tears welled up in her eyes.

Maybe it was the exhaustion and lack of sleep wearing in on her but she felt like more and more of an emotional wreck each day. To the point of just wanting to curl up into a ball and cry.

She took in a huge, shaky breath, pulling some tissues from the tissue box on her desk to wipe her eyes, sniffling as little as she did.

She tossed the used tissues in the bin before getting back to writing.

–

"Why hello there, Dubya Addams," Steve greeted Yule in the morning, leaning against the railing of the front porch.

Lucky Mom was out and Dad was fast asleep, otherwise they'd be frowning and talking about how Jennsen's been hanging around the wrong people.

The goth chick was definitely in their category of 'wrong people'.

Yule got out of her car, slamming the door and scowling at the _Addams Family_ reference. "Just because you're a cripple, doesn't mean I won't punch you," she said, folding her arms.

Steve just smiled. "God must've been in a real foul mood for you to be born."

"Don't blame God, honey, blame the people who couldn't keep it in their pants." Yule looked up at Jennsen's window in impatience, yelling from the front yard. "Jen, hurry up!"

"Coming!" She raced down the stairs and out the door to meet Yule, tired and frazzled.

"Pleasure talkin' to ya, Stevie Wonder." Yule smiled falsely at Steve before looking at Jennsen, double taking. "Woah. You look like shit, Jen."

"Stayed up doing assignments," she mumbled, walking to the car and getting in. "Let's go before we're late."

"You heard Jenny. Let's go. Snap, snap." Steve clicked his fingers twice.

Yule flipped him off before getting in the car. "Your brother's a douche," she said, buckling up and speeding off down the road.

Jennsen chuckled, yawning as she slumped a little in her seat, nodding off to sleep slightly.

"So listen..." she glanced over at Jennsen quickly. "Jen, you awake?"

"Hmm?" she said, eyes still shut.

"I'll be blunt... I heard you were sitting with Thirty Three in the library last week."

Her eyes cracked open to give Yule a side long glance. "Yeah?"

"Well, actually, I eavesdropped on Lyla. I didn't want to just say anything out front. To be honest I didn't know what to think. Now I hear he's talking to you quite a bit."

"There's no privacy in Dillon is there?"

"Nope." Yule kept her eyes on the road, her grip on the steering wheel tightening. "Last time I checked you weren't too enthusiastic about jocks."

She raised an eyebrow. "You think I'm enthusiastic about Tim?"

"First names, now?"

Jennsen sighed, feeling as though she was being lectured by her mother. "Gimme a break."

"It's odd, Jennsen. Real odd. You hanging around _Riggins_? Seriously?"

"Look, I just want some shut eye for a bit. And your yammering isn't helping any. So shut it." Being tired tended to make her rash and aggravated.

"Alright, alright," Yule budged. After a moment her mouth quirked into a grin as she said, "I must say, though. The bitchiness you've displayed has left me impressed."

Jennsen smiled a little.

"But we're going to talk about this later," Yule said, or ordered more like.

"Done deal," Jennsen murmured, her face evening out as she closed her eyes and nodded off to sleep.

–

A horn beeped, jolting her out of her sleep.

Disoriented, Jennsen looked around, realizing she was at the school's parking lot.

"Rise and shine, Jen," Tim greeted enthusiastically, slamming the car door of his truck. He clutched his keys and bag as he glanced over at the now awake girl in the car next to him.

"You know you didn't have to do that," Yule said angrily from the drivers side.

"I did," he replied back. Jennsen sluggishly got out of the car, grabbing her bag and books with a yawn before slamming the door. "Let's walk, Jay." He placed an arm around her shoulder, guiding her down the lot. "I'll have her outta your hair for a few, _Addams_," he called out back to the goth.

Yule glared murderously at his back. "Douche bag."

Tim walked Jennsen down the pathway, asking, "So, how was the paper, filler?"

"A thorn in my side," she muttered, finding it odd that his arm was still around her. "Do you have to _make_ your writing look like chicken scratch?"

"Football's my only skill... well, other than..."

"Don't even," she cut in, pulling away from him. He smirked. "My verdict is," she began, getting to the point. "you did alright. There were parts that were unnecessary, like those bits of recounting. Teachers want techniques and analysis, not a narrative summary. It'd help if you read the text as well."

"I hav–"

"_Have not_, exactly," she interrupted, sensing the lie. "At least see if there's a film version of it that you can watch. That might help. Read your booklet if you're lost or check for some info online. Spark-notes work wonders."

"That's too much for lil old me to do right now, soooo..." deep breath.

She shook her head. "Nope. I'm not writing your study notes."

His head turned a little and he gave her _that_ look again. "Please."

Yeah, he was using her. She'd be a fool if she didn't know that. And she'd known it from the get go.

But somehow she couldn't convince herself to argue back, no matter how hard she tried.

He saw her expression cave in and ruffled the hair on her head as he grinned. "Thanks, Jay. You're a champ."

–

"You're helping him with his work or do you mean actually _doing_ his work?" Yule asked. She spent the better part of recess listening attentively to Jennsen's explanation, a little surprised by what she was hearing. And angry at Tim for using her.

"I mean, I thought I was helping. And he was actually making an effort at first, but..."

"People don't change. When they get given a chance for a fresh start it's just like the honeymoon phase; it may be great at first but then it goes downhill and you're back at square one." The statement may have seemed cold and harsh, but the sincerity in her eyes let Jennsen know that Yule was just trying to get her message through; that sometimes reality was made to be mean. "Cut your losses and drop him."

"I can't do that."

"Why the hell not?" Yule hissed out. Then she assumed the worst. "Jen, don't tell me you're crushing on–"

"No. Lord no! I just... I feel like he needs help and I don't know why..." Yule was startled to see her friend's eyes get glassy. "But I feel like something bad's gonna happen and I can't just sit by and do nothing. I wanna stop it."

"Jen." Yule sounded more than alarmed. "_Jennsen_, look at me." She glanced up, seeing a grim expression on Yule's face. Angry or amused, Jennsen was used to, but she'd never seen her friend this serious before in her life. "He is _not_ your brother. He may be a football player, but you can't just use that as an excuse. If anything happens to Riggins it'll be on him, not you. Don't think he's just a second chance to prove you can make a difference. He is _not_ another Steve you can save this time around."

Jennsen rubbed her eyes with the palms of her hands, looking sick and tired and angry with herself. "I can't sleep well anymore. I feel so damn tired, but I can't even sleep. I hate this. I hate being so pathetic and emotional. But I can't stop myself."

Yule gripped her friend in a fierce hug. "Snap out of it, Jennsen. Don't do this to yourself. Please don't."

She just blinked, keeping the tears at bay.

–

She placed her dishes in the dishwasher.

"Can you clean Tommy's face, Jennsen?" her Mom asked.

"Yeah." Jennsen grabbed the small cloth from the counter, turning to look at Thomas, or Tommy as they liked to call him. She laughed a little at his face. "Wow, you made a mess, little one." She washed the cloth in warm water and wiped her baby brother's face, much to his chagrin. His face wrinkled up and he started crying, not liking one second of it. "Almost done, almost done," she reassured, wiping the rest of the mess. "There were go."

Jennsen tossed the cloth in the sink, rinsing it off and then washing her hands with the pump soap on the kitchen window sill. Drying her hands with a clean cloth, she smiled at Thomas. Her eyes went cross eyed and he giggled gleefully at her expression.

"Oh, isn't that sweet. He always giggles with you." Mom took him out of his highchair, kissing her son's cheek. "He never giggles for his mommy."

She was putting on that baby voice again, the one that sounded like _Elmer Fudd_.

"Got homework to finish." Jennsen tucked her hands in the back pockets of her jeans.

"More homework?" she smoothed over Tommy's hair as she said, "I should have a talk with your teachers; get them to cut you some slack."

"No, it's fine," she reassured, walking down the hallway. "Nothing I didn't sign up for."

"Alright, dear. But just let me know and–"

"Yeah, yeah, I get ya." Jennsen walked upstairs to her room, shutting it behind her.

She switched on her lamp and closed the curtains.

She hated when it was dark outside.

It felt like she was running out of time to get things done.

It felt like she was going to have another sleepless night again.

–

She took out her sandwich made from home, pulling back the cling wrap before taking a bite. Most of the time she preferred eating in the library or somewhere else private, but now she just didn't care. She was too damn hungry and tired and impatient. And she was starting to get sick of peanut butter and jelly.

"I hope I don't fail the Spanish test," Yule sighed, flicking through her notes.

"You say that before every test," Jennsen murmured, covering her mouth with her hand as she chewed.

"I don't always... Oh my god, remember when Mrs. Montoya drilled Karl? She said he sounded like a dying rat."

Jennsen snorted with laughter, almost choking on her sandwich. "Not while I'm eating, please."

Yule grinned. "_Qué dijiste_?" Her eyes flickered to the left of Jennsen and she lifted her chin in that area. "_Hay un problema_._"_

Jennsen turned her head to find Zoey and Tiffany glaring down at her. Well, Tiffany wasn't glaring as such, more like trying to look as though she had attitude in her eyes.

"What's this I hear about you talking with Riggins?" Zoey asked.

Jennsen didn't know how to answer without her head being bitten off.

"Jealousy is an ugly thing, especially when it deludes you into thinking the ridiculous," Yule said, still flicking through her notes and seeming as cool as a cucumber. "_Ella es una perra_."

Jennsen laughed.

"_Perra, perra, perra._"

Jennsen laughed even harder.

"English, please," Zoey snapped.

"I'm calling you a bitch. Nothing new, really," Yule answered. "Hmm... Oooh, I know... _Ella es una puta._"

The lack of sleep must've been getting to her head because Jennsen was laughing so hard she had trouble breathing, her eyes watering.

"Maybe I'll pass the test after all."

"Shut up!" Zoey again.

Jennsen wiped the tears from her eyes as she composed herself. She tried not to look Yule's way, knowing that if she did she'd start laughing again.

"We heard Tim's been talking to you," Tiffany cut to the chase, all the while chewing on that confounded chewing gum of hers. "Catherine said she heard from Brittany and Sarah that she saw you two talking in the hallway between classes."

Once again, Jennsen was left speechless.

"No way he'd be interested in you," Zoey said, looking her up and down. "So I'm guessing he just wants you to do all his school work."

"That's rich coming from you," Yule pointed out.

Zoey glared at the goth before returning her eyes back at Jennsen. "Why are you talking to him?"

Jennsen was tired, which usually led to her being reckless with her choice of words. "Umm, why do you even hang around us?" Palm upturned, she gestured her hand to Zoey. "You, you're a rally girl for crying out loud." Her gaze moved to the brunette beside her. "And I don't even know what category you're under; no offense." Tiffany didn't look like she got the insult. "I mean, Yule spends lunch and recess berating you like it's a sport–"

"That's true." The goth was trying to contain her laughter.

"–and you're _still_ here, talking to us?"

"You're such a bitch." Zoey seemed angry, but a little surprised and... intimidated?

"You think I'm a bitch now? Wait till I'm mad." She rubbed her furrowed brow, looking over at Yule. "Can you please get them to go away? I just wanna eat my sandwich in peace."

"You heard her." Yule gave them a glare and they both reluctantly walked away. "Dude, how did we ever managed to co-exist with them for so long?"

"Call it a miracle." Her gaze followed Tiffany and Zoey as they both left the room.

Yule's gaze then snapped to Jennsen's direction as she exclaimed, "You said _bitch_!"

"I know." That's when Jennsen's eyes caught onto Tim in far end of the cafeteria.

He was talking to the other Panther jocks; laughing about something. Jennsen had been driven to the point of hysterics from lack of sleep and yet there Tim was, seeming as carefree as a leaf in the wind.

Her jaw clenched.

She wanted to tear that damn leaf apart.

Jennsen wrapped up the half of her sandwich and placed it in her lunch container, shoving it in her bag before standing up.

"Where you going?"

"To the library," she said as she slung her bag over her shoulder.

"I thought you wanted to eat your sandwich?"

"Not hungry anymore," she murmured.

Yule's eyes followed Jennsen's line of vision. She glanced at Tim, then back at Jennsen. Understanding filled her eyes and she nodded.

Jennsen walked out of the cafeteria, anger brooding inside her that was about to unleash a storm.

–

It was after school had finished and she was waiting near the parking lot for Yule so she could get dropped off home. The goth said she had to get some things from her locker before they left.

That was when Tim walked up to her, talking about some homework. She wasn't sure what subject, or what it was about. She was so mad she couldn't even speak or hear properly.

"Well, Jay," he clapped her gently on the shoulder, like they were buddies. They were _not_ buddies. "you've got some work to do."

She raised an eyebrow at him.

"You, we, whatever." Tim shrugged, clutching the bag strap around his shoulder. "I need to go do some stuff." The other eyebrow raised with it. "Why do I need to explain myself to you?" he half muttered to himself, brow scrunched. "It's very important," he reasoned. "Crucial to my grades."

She reminded herself that she didn't get into this to be used. Even though she wanted to help, she couldn't stand it any more.

Jennsen knew it was the lack of sleep. She knew it was long hours of study and short intervals of seeing Riggins around school, looking lazy and laid back; talking with teammates or flirting with rally girls in the hallway.

But as much as she tried to stop it, all that the frustration within her kept building and building until eventually she just snapped.

"Sure." He was taken aback by the sugary sweet tone to her voice. "Go ahead." Then the tone changed into an instant, like a flash flood; sudden, fast and catastrophic. Jennsen was beyond pissed. "But if you think you're dumping me with _all_ your work, you are _dead_ wrong," she said with clenched teeth.

"Look, the game's in two days and I can't afford to stuff up," Tim breathed, a little worried. "I've got too much riding on this, Jen. I don't need these distractions."

"Well I'm sure Coach would like to hear of the 'hard work' you've been doing to keep your grades up, the genuine and studious way."

For once he looked as though he'd overstepped his boundary with her. "Please... It's just one day, that's all."

"One day for now, a couple more later and then we'll be back at square one. You can handle all this; football and grades. As crazy as it sounds, you can do both."

"Who do you think I am?" Tim asked, brow furrowed, eyes narrowed as he shook his head.

"I suppose the better question is: are you really a quitter, or is that what you want them all to think?"

He swallowed, not knowing what else to do but look away.

There was silence for a moment.

"I'm fed up and I'm done." The anger in her voice was palpable, her eyes cold. The fact that she wasn't even yelling made her look even more scary. "So next time you come see me, be sure that it won't be for more favors. I didn't sign up for this to be your rally girl."

She walked down the parking lot towards Yule's car, not wanting to look at him any longer.

–

Right after dinner, Jennsen excused herself and headed to bed. She didn't stay up late finishing home work or reading through textbooks. She'd get it done tomorrow, during her free period.

That night, she'd slept like a log.

And woke up in the morning, feeling at ease.

Her mind felt clearer now; calmer.

Mom dropped her off to school, since she was on her way to the grocery store anyway.

Jennsen opened her locker, rifling through her books for her Spanish textbook.

"Hey, filler," she heard him greet from beside her.

She didn't bother with a response. Didn't bother looking at him.

She was surprised he was even at school this early.

"Look, I'm sorry..." Jennsen still didn't budge. "What else do you want me to say?" he asked.

"This is one time that I won't give you answers for a change." She grabbed the textbook and slammed her locker door, glancing at him.

She blinked.

Did a double take.

He looked... terrible.

Tim's gaze faltered. "I guess I just... It's a habit for me, y'know." he gave a one shoulder shrug, seeming almost awkward. "I wasn't thinking and..." His eyes met hers. "I'm just sorry. I really am. I've been a jerk. And I don't expect you to accept that, but if you could just..." He sighed. "I promise I won't do ya wrong again."

"I gave you a chance and you blew it. You took advantage of my trust and you let me down, big time."

"I know." He looked disappointed in himself.

Jennsen breathed through her nose, giving Tim an stern look. Then, after a long pause, she looked over his shoulder, spotting someone near by. "Landry!" she called out.

Landry walked towards them, some textbooks in his hand and a toothpick in his mouth. "I am being summoned?"

"Yeah, Tim needs some help on his homework. And before you ask what you're getting out of it, Tim's willing to help you with football, maybe get you some time on the field. Isn't that right, Riggs?"

The Fullback's brow furrowed questioningly.

Landry looked between Tim and Jennsen. "I have the distinct impression that this wasn't negotiated between either of you before you called me over."

"That'd be correct, Lando," Tim said, eyes still locked on Jennsen. Her gaze was unwavering.

"I don't negotiate," she replied with resolve. Jennsen couldn't lose this one and she knew it.

That was what made it all the more enjoyable.

"What am I, a terrorist?" Tim countered mockingly.

Jennsen just smiled as though what the Fullback had said was spot on, looking over at Landry. "Have fun."

"So..." Landry chewed at his toothpick. "When should we start? Tim? Tim? Wh_–_why are you walking away?" He shuffled on his feet, watching Tim's back as he walked off without a response. "O-kay then... I'm just gonna assume that the deal's still on!" Still no response. "Field time," Landry mused to himself, a smile on his face. "Cookie time for me."

* * *

_Had to bring Landry back into it. He's just so fun to write. :D_

_I don't speak Spanish; used an online translator. So if it sounds wrong, there's my excuse. Let me know if I'm horribly off._

_Intended translation (in order of appearance):_

_**Qué dijiste? – what did you say?**_

_**Hay un problema – there is a problem.**_

_**Ella es una perra – she is a bitch/dog**_

_**Ella es una puta – she is a whore**_

_A few colourful words, I know. But it's all part of Yule's character (excuses, excuses; I'm a terrible influence). lol._

_EDIT: fixed one of the terms. Thanks Rose!_


	9. Something To Prove

_Back again! Hope everyone had a great Christmas and New Year! :) _

_I__ncredibly sorry about the lack of updating. I don't know where my muse went with this one. I can recall a time where my updates on ffnet were daily, if not weekly. Wish I could revert my mentality/creativity to those days, but I'm afraid life will not allow it. Anyway, hope you're still digging this story by the end of this chapter._

_

* * *

_

Chapter Eight – Something To Prove

"Tim?" Landry called out, tone wavering on the brink of impatience. "Tim? Are you listenin'?" Pause. He raised his eyebrows, lips pursed a little. "Do you want me to start saying your full name, 'cause I will go there if I have to." Then a thought crossed his mind and he added, "Only it'd be more effective if I knew your middle name." Another thought. "Wait, do you even _have_ a middle name?"

Deep in contemplation, Tim snapped out of his reverie and asked suddenly, "Are you good friends with Jennsen?"

Landry blinked, caught off guard. "Jennsen...?" Tim nodded. "Um... I wouldn't necessarily call us BFF's, but... we're buddy's, I guess."

"For how long?"

"Since she transferred here." Landry gave a half shrug. "Principal told me to show her around school."

Brow slightly furrowed, Tim asked, "You ever hear about Jennsen's older brother?"

"Well, yeah..." Landry scratched the back of his neck with the end of a pencil gripped in his hand. "It was kinda big news, back when their family moved here." The pencil was now tucked behind his ear. "Steve was the best running back in the game before his accident."

Tim's eyes narrowed a little, mind mulling over the new piece of information. His next question was low, a subtle murmur, belying the intensity of his expression. "What was Jennsen like then?"

Landry blinked again, eyebrows scrunched as he shook his head. "Why are you asking all these questions?"

"Just wonderin'," was Tim's slow reply.

Landry hesitated for a moment, not sure whether to feel confused or suspicious. Then he answered, "She seemed fine. I know she went to counseling for a while, Principal's suggestion. And she doesn't really like it when anyone mentions football to her; understandable, of course." A sudden thought occurred to Landry and he blurted out, "Wait, what's this all about?"

"Nothing," Tim dismissed quickly.

"More than 'nothing'." Landry's eyebrows raised. "I don't think I've ever heard you speak this much in your entire life."

"Wanna make a note of it, Lando?" Tim said dryly.

"Might just do that. Y'know, _Guinness Book of Records_." Landry grinned, not able to suppress his surprise. "Really, that's _astounding_."

Tim stared at Landry, shaking his head slightly.

"Seriously, though, do you have a middle name?"

–

Jennsen turned the page to her book, tilting her her to one side and releasing the tension in her neck with a crack.

Her eyes flittered over to the students in the cafeteria, scanning for Yule. The goth was nowhere to be seen, but Jennsen figured she'd show up soon enough. In the mean time, she did a little leisure reading.

Some part of Jennsen was still a little self conscious, being in the cafeteria on her own. On her first week at Dillon High, she remembered being paranoid about sitting by herself; getting stares from the rest of the students. But she reminded herself that most teens were too absorbed in their own lives to notice any loners.

"Hey."

Jennsen glanced up from her book, surprised, but tried not to show it on her face. She looked back at her book, quickly replying, "Hi."

It had been only yesterday that she'd set the deal between Tim and Landry, and she hadn't seen the Fullback since. Jennsen didn't expect him to talk to her any time soon. She was annoyed with him and thought that he was equally annoyed at her.

After a moment of pause, Tim asked, "You're not still mad at me, are ya?"

Jennsen tried not to roll her eyes. "Mad?" She shook her head. "No... But bitter?" Her eyebrows quirked and she tilted her head to the side. "Let's just say limes and lemons wouldn't be able to outdo me."

"I'm sorry."

"And the echo begins," she replied in a monotone. Jennsen bookmarked her page and shut it, knowing she wouldn't get any reading done with Tim hovering over her.

"I want you to come to the game this Friday."

Jennsen didn't even blink, just stared up at Tim in confusion. "What?"

"Come to my game on Friday."

Exasperation was wrought on her expression. "Where on _earth_ did this come from?"

He seemed real fond of curve-balls... For a football player, that is.

Tim's eyes fell and he sighed. "Look... I'm sorry for what I did. I'm working as best I can, with grades and football." His gaze lifted, and he looked almost disappointed; with himself of with her, Jennsen wasn't sure. "I just want you to see that." Her eyes dropped at the words. Guilt surfaced from within. "Think it over, okay?"

Jennsen nodded, not able to look him in the eyes.

"See you, filler." His tone was soft, warm and sincere.

It would be hard to say no to him if he kept that up.

–

"Getting much sleep now?" Yule asked as she walked towards Jennsen, leaning against the locker beside her.

"Hell yes."

Yule's brow scrunched, eyes widening a little. "Okay, that was weird, hearing you say that."

Jennsen took out her maths textbook from her locker and looked at Yule, raising an eyebrow. "I thought you approved of me cussing."

"Dude, 'hell' is hardly cussing. It's not even _close_." Her eyes were drawn to something over Jennsen's shoulder. Her brow furrowed further (if that was even possible). "Ginger on your six. I'm gonna hightail to the car and wait for you there," Yule said, her thumb jabbing to the exit down the hall. "He's giving me some weird military-style hand signal."

Jennsen turned around to see what the hand gestures were but as soon as she spun around Landry's arms were quickly at his side. "Oh, hey Jennsen," he said, feigning casual, as if he hadn't noticed her.

Yule rolled her eyes. "I'll leave you to it. But don't take too long. I've gotta start work soon."

Jennsen nodded and Yule walked down the hall. Seeing it as his cue, Landry walked towards her. "Ahoy there."

"Hello Landry." Jennsen shut her locker then turned to face him once more, her lips quirked in a smile. "How's the pupil going?"

"Good..." Landry's eyebrows raised and he added, "Surprisingly."

"What do you mean?" Jennsen asked.

"I've gone through this process before with Tim." Jennsen nodded in acknowledgment of Landry's words. "Back then it was the Taylor's hounding him. Mrs. T gave him a grilling to do his own homework, and when he didn't listen to her, Coach T gave him hell in practice."

"So...?" Jennsen shook her head, expression telling him that she still didn't get the picture.

"So, now I don't think it's either of them that's motivating him."

She still wasn't getting it.

"Tim's doing this to prove himself to you," he followed up.

Slightly surprised, Jennsen thought over Landry's words with a furrowed brow. "He shouldn't be doing this for me," she said slowly, honestly. "He should be doing this for himself."

"And the first thing he needs is to earn your trust," Landry said simply. "That's what he's doing."

Jennsen seemed a little troubled by what he was telling her, lower lip bitten in thought.

"He may be a bit douchie at times... Well, he's a bit douchie a lot of the time." Jennsen smiled at that. "But he's trying to do right by you," Landry said. "And that's an admirable thing, coming from him."

"It is," she agreed, though her tone held a myriad of emotions.

Now that he was putting the effort in, she felt bad that she'd have to turn his offer down.

Jennsen didn't want to go to the football game tomorrow. It wasn't because of Tim or anything. It all came down to the sport and her brother. And since being grounded, her parents were on the lookout at all times. Jennsen knew they were concerned. She'd heard her Mom crying to her Dad over how fast she was growing up and how further apart they were now.

No, she couldn't go to the game. She didn't want to do that to Steve.

But Jennsen knew she'd have to talk to Tim.

She just didn't know how to go about saying 'no'.

–

Friday morning and Jennsen found Tim in the library. She'd heard the saying 'stranger things have happened', but in this moment no stranger thing had happened.

She walked towards the Fullback hesitantly.

He looked up when she stood beside his desk, cluttered with papers and books. "Jen."

"Hey." Jennsen sat at the opposite end of the table. "Just wanted to see how you were doing."

Tim's eyes took in the scattered notes as he scratched at the back of his head. "I'm good. I'm great..."

"Good..." Jennsen nodded. "Great." And inwardly cringed at the echo.

"Have you thought about it?" Tim asked. He didn't beat around the subject or anything.

Jennsen swallowed, eyes darting to the table. She pulled out the chair opposite of him and sat down on it. With a breath, she composed herself. "I don't think–" Her face scrunched up momentarily and she took another breath. "I don't _know_ if I can handle it. It's been a long time..."

"You can't keep on runnin' away from this," Tim cut in. "Believe me, I know. And I know it's tough, but sometimes when you face the problem head on in, it isn't as bad as you think." She wasn't budging. "Come on, Jen." He swallowed, scooting his chair forward a little, lowering his head to meet her gaze. "I need you to do this." He blinked slowly as he took in a breath. "And I think you need this too."

Jennsen wasn't sure what to make of that. "I don't see how me being there will make a difference."

"You don't have to." Jennsen frowned in thought. "Nope, no thinking. Stop," Tim ordered, slight humor in his eyes. She smiled slightly at the words. "This is me askin' you to use your instincts, Jay. No regrets. Just go for it."

Her smile fell. Pause. "Alright, I'll go to your game. Just as long as–"

"No ulterior motive, I swear."

"Ulterior." Jennsen eyebrows quirked in faux amazement. "Oooh, fancy word."

"Landry's a great teacher," Tim quipped dryly.

She chuckled. "Oh yeah. How's the football mentoring going, by the way?" Jennsen was quizzing from both sides.

"It's going to crap, that's how it's goin'." Jennsen smiled widely. Tim paused at her reaction, apparently not amused by her amusement. Then she giggled. "Good to know you find it funny." He shook his head as he muttered, "How the hell am I gonna get Lando field time?"

"You'll find a way."

"Right." Tim didn't sound convinced. "If I was a bible thumper, I'd be praying right about now."

Jennsen laughed.

–

As soon as she got home she ate some leftovers in the fridge for lunch, then showered and changed. When it was getting close to game time, she headed down the stairs and put on her shoes by the couch.

Her parents were still out working, and her father had taken an extra shift. It was harder for them to get work and pay for Steve's medical bills after they'd quit their old jobs in Austin.

But they'd made their beds, and so they'd have to lie in them.

Jennsen finished tying up the right shoelace and started on the left shoe.

It had been around ten minutes since she'd called up Yule, rather reluctantly, and asked her for a lift. Jennsen didn't like bothering Yule into being her taxi driver, so she made a mental note of job searching. It'd be stressful with school, but at least she'd be able to save up, get a car, and stop hassling her friend into driving her everywhere.

Jennsen could always see if they needed work at the printing place Yule was at. Or maybe she could ask Matt if he'd put in a good word at the Alamo Freeze...

"Where are you goin'?"

Jennsen looked up, seeing Steve by the end of the couch. For a guy that hobbled around the place, he sure was stealthy. Then again, the Coach back at Austin had always said that Steve was light on his feet.

"You gonna answer me?" Steve pressed after a moment of silence.

"Out," Jennsen said, and finished tying up her shoe laces.

"On a Friday night?"

She sighed, seeing no use in avoiding it. "I'm going to a football game."

There was an awkward moment of silence. "Thought you hated football," Steve said, his tone rather constrained.

"Yeah, well, I didn't at one point, remember?" Jennsen swallowed, turning to look at him from her position on the couch. "Same as you."

"You want to see some poor shmucks hurt themselves?" Steve's response was quick, not even fierce, but his eyes said it all. "Fine. Go right ahead. I don't care." His gaze was cold and hard, and she had to look away from it, eyes stinging at his expression.

"Seems like you care," Jennsen mumbled, though she knew he heard it.

"You are being such a bitch right now," Steve said evenly.

Jennsen jolted at the words, staring at her brother with a mixture of guilt and outrage.

"I was nearly _paralyzed_, Jennsen," Steve bit out. "I was lucky they fixed me up in time; if you call _this–"_ Steve gestured to his leg, "_–_lucky. So excuse me if I sound a little bitter." He seemed restless. She didn't know if he wanted to shout at her, shake her, or walk away. Eventually, he chose the latter option, walking past her, eyes blank. "Have fun at the game." His tone matched his eyes.

She heard his door slam shut.

And so Jennsen walked out, slamming the front door equally as hard.

–

Yule parked the car and turned off the ignition. She looked over at Jennsen. "Why are you doing this?" she asked, gaze probing.

Jennsen's hands were in her lap and she looked down at them as she responded, "Because Tim's seeing his part of the deal through. He wanted me to go to his game, so I'm going."

"You don't have to-"

"I do," Jennsen cut in, looking up at Yule. "I need to. This isn't just for him. It's for me as well."

Yule's eyes seemed to catch on to what she was saying. She paused in thought for a moment before asking, "How'd your brother take it?"

Jennsen's gaze dropped as she shook her head, expression belying everything.

"Right. Did you want me to talk to him?"

"I don't think he'll want to talk right now." Jennsen opened the car door. "But thanks for offering." She stepped out, hit by the cold air and the distant sound of cheering. The crowed was getting revved up for the game.

Jennsen felt anxiety burn in her stomach and tried to squash the feeling.

"No problemo. You mind if I just sit this one out?" Yule leaned over from her position in the driver's side, looking at Jennsen through the open passenger's side door. The goth then held up the magazine on her dashboard for good measure.

Jennsen nodded. "That's fine." She shut the door, walking down the parking lot and toward the football field, folding her arms out of nervousness.

It was the noise that brought back memories; the rounds of applause, the cheers, the cheerleaders, and the band playing. It made that nauseating feeling intensify as it coursed through her; all too dizzy and uncomfortable; familiar and unfamiliar at the same time.

"Keep it together, Jennsen," she admonished herself, folding her arms as she reached the bleachers.

It was ridiculous for her to act this way. It wasn't like she was the one in the accident; wasn't like she was the fallen jock. But somehow she felt like it was her fault. Jennsen had seen what the accident had done to her brother and their family, and she couldn't bear to see that happen to anyone else.

It was selfish, sure, but she didn't care. She was in a losing battle.

"Jen..." She spun around, seeing Tim in the distance, suited up his football attire. A smile spread on his face as he blinked languidly. "You made it." He saw her expression and was by her side in a beat. "Hey, you alright?"

Jennsen nodded. But after a moment, she shook her head. "Who am I kidding?" She felt sick.

"Don't– hey, look at me." He gripped her shoulders, garnering her attention. "You can do this. I know it's different, with everyone else here, but you were fine when they were gone. When it was just me an' you, remember? That's all this is. 'Kay?"

She nodded.

Tim pulled her into a bear hug.

"Thanks for comin'."

She stood awkwardly, hands by her sides. She didn't want to wrap them around his waist or anything; that would seem too intimate. Besides, he wasn't actually giving her much room to move her arms, with the way he was crushing her against him.

Tim pulled away and she saw that his eyes were alight with adrenaline.

"I still don't see how I'm making a difference."

He smiled with a shake of his head before kissing her on the cheek. "Hang in there, Jennsen."

She blinked, shocked as she watched him walk away.

What the hell just happened?

* * *

_Landry has become my all time favourite character to write. And Tim, also. We cannot forget Tim. :) _

_So... D'you dig it? Yay or nay?_


	10. Suck It Up

_Y'all are too nice. Thanks for supporting me with this story, even though I'm sure you're (figuratively) pulling your hair out waiting. Hang in there, people. :)_

_By the way, anyone else a mess now that FNL is over? I could litter this A/N with sad faces, I really could._

* * *

Chapter Nine - Suck It Up

Yule yawned, shuffling further into the car seat before flicking the page of her magazine. She'd never been a fan of football. It just wasn't in her. But, even though she despised the game, she had second thoughts about leaving Jennsen on her own like that.

_Jen needs to do this_. _She needs to deal with this alone_.

That thought was all that kept Yule from stepping out of that damn car.

But she was kidding herself if she thought she could read anything in her current state of mind. Yule tossed the magazine on the passenger's seat with a sigh before locking up her car and shutting her eyes. She doubted she'd sleep, but resting her eyes would have to do.

It was a while after that she heard a buzzing sound.

Yule pried her eyes open, scanning the area in confusion. Her eyes were drawn to a light green glow at the floor of her car, by the passenger's side. Yule leaned over, head tilting to examine the floor.

She realized it was Jennsen's phone.

_Must've slipped out before she went to watch the football game._

Yule reached out, snatching up the phone in her hand.

She saw Steve's name on the screen.

"None of my damn business," Yule muttered, deciding it was best to let it ring.

The moment the phone stopped buzzing it started up again. Same name on the screen.

Yule let it ring again and once it stopped she paused, waiting for the phone to buzz once more.

All was silent.

She sighed, shut her eyes, then rested her head on the driver's side window.

**Buzz. Buzz. Buzz.**

Gritting her teeth, Yule answered Jennsen's phone.

"_You get back here right now, Jenny_," Steve warned.

Yule yawned. "Sorry. She's temporarily unavailable."

"_Then make her available, _Wednesday."

Yule rolled her eyes. "Oh yeah, I'm totally gonna go and do that for you, even though you've always been a douche to me."

"_Please, just get her_." Steve's tone was touching on desperate.

"You're a fool if you think I'm gonna do that," Yule said.

Silence.

"You really hurt her," she added.

More silence, and then: "_Yeah, well. She hurt me, too_."

_Defensive, much?_

"But she's trying to move on," Yule retorted. "And she can't when you're around."

"_Shut the fuck up_," Steve snapped. "_I don't need your opinion_."

Yule flinched. "That the way you treat your sister?" she asked, eyebrow arched. "No wonder she can't stand you anymore."

Something in her tone must have gotten through to him, because he sighed before responding, "_I don't mean to be a dick_."

"Then why are you?"

"_She just... gets to me. Everyone does._" He sounded like he was restless. "_And the moment I'm out of the house all I get are pity stares or weird looks. It all..._" Definitely restless. "_It annoys the shit outta me._"

"Well, you aren't the only one," Yule reminded.

"_What?_"

"You think you're the first person to call me a member of the Adamm's family? I'm considered the freak of Dillon."

"_Right._" Pause. "_How's Jennsen?_"

"A little sad, but more nervous," Yule answered.

"_Why? I mean, about the nervous part._"

Yule found his curiosity curious. He hadn't been the nicest brother to Jennsen; she knew that from the get-go. "I don't think you realize how fucked up she's been since your accident," she began, not wanting to put it gently. "She's got it in her head that she's a bad luck charm."

"And why're you telling me this?" By Steve's tone, she knew he didn't take too well with blame dumping.

"I'm telling you 'cause you need to right your wrongs with her," Yule said impatiently.

"I– I can't..." Steve stopped and Yule waited. He started again: "I can't deal with this sort of stuff. Not with her. I can't do it."

"Yeah, well then, suck it up," Yule said. She ended the call and let her head drop against the head rest with a huff of air.

Thankfully, Steve didn't call back. Yule knew he had a lot to think about.

She had a lot to think about.

Her eyes shut and, in the darkness, all was quiet.

–

**Knock. Knock. Knock.**

Yule jolted. Slightly disoriented, she got her bearings, realizing she was waiting for Jennsen to watch a football game. Which may have sounded simple, but, for Jen, it was a trial built up over years of family feuds and breakdowns.

Yule rubbed her eyes, leaning over to unlock the passenger's side door. Jennsen opened the door and plonked in the seat.

"Hey..." Yule was about to tell Jennsen about the conversation she had with Steve, but the thought vanished once she saw tears in her friend's eyes. Alarm raced through her. "Oh my god. Are you okay?"

Jennsen laughed through her tears, wiping them away. "I'm good. I'm great," she said.

Yule wasn't necessarily relieved to hear it. "Jen–"

"Honestly, I'm fine. Just a little overwhelmed." Jennsen sniffed, snatching a tissue from the tissue box on the dashboard. "I'd appreciate it if you would just ignore me and drive."

"Alright." Eyebrows raised, Yule put on her seatbelt and started up the car.

_Well shit, _she thought. _The Keller family sure have issues._

–

Jennsen sipped her chocolate milkshake as Yule watched her. "Okay, will you give it a rest?"

After being dropped off on Friday night, Yule had called Jennsen up the following day for an explanation. Since she was craving something chocolatey (Steve ate the block of chocolate in the fridge, she just knew that he did) she figured they could go to the Alamo Freeze and talk.

"You are the weirdest person," Yule said, looking at Jennsen as though she had two heads. "I don't get how someone can have happy tears. Not unless there laughing so hard that they cry."

"I know, but it just happened. It was..." She tried to find the right word, then thought about the Shakespearian in-class essay she was studying for next week. "It was cathartic." Jennsen leaned back on the seat. "I've spent so much time putting myself in a hole, because of what happened with Steve. There was nothing I could've done, but he still made me feel guilty." After finishing her milkshake: "I think I'm mad at him. Actually, yeah. Yeah, I am mad at him."

"Good for you." Yule ate a spoonful of her sundae. "It's about time you did. He's being a real bitch to you."

Jennsen glanced at the sundae.

Yule noticed her, then rolled her eyes. "Fatty." She handed Jennsen her plastic spoon. "Go for it."

"Thanking you kindly." Jennsen scooped up some ice cream and fudge with a grin.

"Your stomach's like a black hole or something," the goth muttered.

Jennsen held back a laugh as she ate and after handing the spoon back to Yule, she backtracked to their original conversation, "But I do feel bad that I don't sympathize for him as much–"

"Jen. You can't just say you're mad and take it back," Yule said, pointing at her with the spoon. "Either you're pissed off at him or you're not. But I hope you know that you deserve to be the former."

"Okay."

"Okay." Yule ate some more of her sundae. "He giving you the silent treatment?" she said, looking down at her sundae. Jennsen watched as she mixed it; the choc fudge and ice cream swirled together.

"Yeah."

Yule looked up. "And you were feeling bad," she admonished.

Jennsen shrugged sheepishly. "He's my brother. I can't help it."

"Well start helping it, missy."

"I'll try to," Jennsen muttered. A thought occurred to her. "Hmm."

"What?" Yule asked, mouth full of ice cream. She winced. "Ah, brain freeze."

"I think I might just work here," Jennsen said.

"What?" Yule was too distracted by her ice cream induced headache to let Jennsen's words sink in.

Jennsen stood from her chair. "I'm gonna go talk to Matt."

_..._

"_Jen!" Tim called out._

_Jennsen turned and saw him walk towards her. "Great game."_

"_Yeah, I know..." Tim's head bent down as he searched her eyes, his own narrowed slightly with that half smile. "But I don't know if you really mean that."_

"_I do." She looked him right in the eye and she knew that he knew something had changed. _

_When the game ended it left her with a different feeling._

_There were several reasons why Steve got his injury. It didn't mean it was the end of the world. But it was her brother that lead her to believe that it was all over; that it was the end of everything; that the outcome of a jocks life would inevitably end in pain and shattered dreams._

_And the 'town screw-up' was the one that showed her otherwise. _

_That it wasn't over. _

_It never was._

_She felt what she thought was safe to label as 'light-hearted'. _

_The smile spread on Tim's face and he opened his mouth to speak before being interrupted._

"_Hey Riggs!" one of the jocks called out. "C'mon man, let's go celebrate. 'Make some memories', as you say."_

"_Just gimme a sec here, Bradley," Tim called out, glancing at his teammate from over Jennsen's shoulder. Then he looked back at her. "Hey, you wanna join me?"_

"_Can't. Still grounded, remember?" He chuckled at the irony in her words. "Now go." She waved the back of her hand in a shooing motion. "Celebrate."_

"_Alright."_

"_And Tim?" He raised his eyebrows, gaze questioning. "Thanks for inviting me." She gave him a tight lipped smile, her eyes bright._

_He nodded, grinned, and jogged over to his teammates._

_Jennsen walked towards Yule's car. She felt the release, the relief, the joy. The heavy burden was gone in an instant and she found it an unfamiliar, but welcome, sensation. There was no searching for that bad feeling hidden in the back of her mind; the one that she always needed to remember to bring her back down from happiness. _

_She was finally weightless and she breathed in deep with the knowledge of it._

_Jennsen got into Yule's car, slammed the door, and put on her seat belt with tears filling her eyes._

_..._

"What did you say to Steve?" Jennsen's mother asked.

It was Sunday afternoon and they were driving to the supermarket for groceries. Mrs. Keller insisted that her daughter come with her; a 'girl's day out', as it were.

Jennsen knew it was an interrogation.

"Mom–"

"He didn't say a word once I got home from work," Erica cut in. "I have a right to be worried."

"I went to see the football game on Friday. I was with a friend," Jennsen answered.

"'Friend'?" her mother queried.

"Zoey," Jennsen lied. "She wanted to hang with me at the game." She paused for effect before adding, "But I'm sorry, I didn't think I needed Steven's permission."

"No, but you needed mine," her mother countered.

"And you'd've said 'no' because of Steve."

"No. Of course not." Jennsen looked skeptical. "You're still grounded, remember?" her mother reminded.

"Mom..." She paused and collected her thoughts. "I did everything you asked me. I did extra chores. I took care of Tom. I even changed his dirty diapers." Jennsen sighed. "I didn't go out to drink or party; I just wanted to see a friend. That's all."

"You went out without my permission."

"Yeah, to watch a _football_ game." Jennsen folded her arms. "Practically all the town is there. And I'm sure more than 80% of Dillon would been outraged if they knew that you banned me from watching football."

"I'm not banning you, now stop giving me attitude, Jennsen." Her mom's tone made her bite her lip. "You're still in my house, and you still follow my rules," Erica said evenly. "Now I won't tell your father about this, but I want to make one thing clear: you talk to me before you set your mind to something. If you're going out, or seeing friends, you still need to ask me."

"Okay." After a pause, Jennsen added, "I'm sorry." And she meant it. She'd gotten into a habit of disobeying her parents, but it didn't mean that she liked it very much.

"Good." Pause. "And I'm sorry, for being hard on you."

"It's okay," Jennsen said. After a few minutes, she figured she might as well talk to her mom about her plans. "I want to get a job," she announced.

"What?" She could tell her mother was doing her best to keep her eyes on the road.

"You wanted me to tell you before I did anything, so..." Jennsen trailed off with a shrug.

"Okay..." Erica took a breath. "I appreciate you being honest, but have you taken everything into consideration?"

"Like what?" Jennsen knew from that point on that the conversation wasn't in her favor.

"Well, Cassandra babysits Tommy from morning to afternoon every weekday. It's gonna cost a lot more money if you're not there take care of him."

"With the money I get from work I can always chip in a little. And if Steve had a job it wouldn't be too costly, either. Not like he babysits Tom or anything."

"He's struggling enough as it is," her mother justified.

"He practically confines himself to the house. All he needs to do is sit by Tom and let him watch cartoons for an hour or two."

"That's not the point."

"What is it, then?" Jennsen asked bluntly.

Her mother shot her an admonishing look, her grip on the steering wheel tightening. "Jennsen–"

"I don't mean to sound rude, ma." Jennsen's eyes darted to the dashboard. "I just want to know why you don't want me to get a job."

She could hear her mother sigh. It took her a moment to answer, "Your father told me about when you snapped at him earlier this week." Jennsen straightened at the words. "We both noticed you've been stressed a lot lately," Mrs. Keller took a turn from the side street onto the highway, eyes straight on the road in front of her. "Point is: I don't think you can handle a job." Jennsen flinched. "I'm not saying you're not capable, Jenny," her mother added quickly. "But I just don't think it's a good idea with all the pressure you get from school." She looked at her daughter briefly, her eyes sincere; wanting her to understand. "Once you get into college, and finish your studies, then you can get a job." She overtook another car, then spoke again, "You can even move out if you want to. But for now, you help around the house and you have an allowance." She paused, giving Jennsen time to think. "Is that enough for now?"

"Yeah." Jennsen slumped against the seat, staring out through her open window. Although she felt slightly defeated, she knew she just had to grit her teeth and bear it.

"I'll get you some Reese's Peanut Butter Cups," she added.

Jennsen rolled her eyes. "'Cause yeah, that'll totally make up for it."

Her mother smiled. "I still know your favorites."

Traffic lights came into view and Erica slowed down to a stop at the red light. That was when a car in the right lane stopped directly opposite of them.

A truck. Riggins truck.

Tim's gaze was locked lazily on the road, arm resting on the open window casually. His eyes took in the surroundings for a moment, from the sky to the stores and cars passing ahead out of boredom.

That was when he did a double-take, spotting Jennsen in the car right next to him. A beguiling smile stole across his lips.

Jennsen looked down and fought her embarrassment at being seen by the Fullback with her mother oblivious and complaining about the potholes they'd passed along the highway.

She chanced another glance at Riggins.

He was still staring at her.

Jennsen looked away once more. A smiled pursed at her lips, pulling further and further until her dimples became more pronounced.

"Jenny, what on earth are you smiling about?"

Jennsen sighed at her mother's tone.

"Mrs. Jay!" Tim called out, head leaning over to try and peer around Jennsen in order to see her mother.

"Oh, uh... Hello there." Erica was nothing but a deer caught in the proverbial headlights.

"Hi. Tim Riggins." He was grinning.

"Yes..." Her mother trailed off. "Yes, um... Erica Keller."

Tim looked Jennsen's way again.

"I take it you..." Mrs. Keller cleared her throat. "You know Jennsen?"

"Oh yeah, she and I go _way_ back," Tim said with a grin.

Jennsen stifled her snort.

"'Way back'," her mother echoed. Her face looked slightly pale.

"Well anyway, pleasure meeting you, Mrs. Keller." He looked at Jennsen. "Jen." He winked before turning his eyes back to the road and driving off.

"Mom," Jennsen prompted. The traffic light was green.

A car from behind them honked impatiently and her mother started, checking the rearview mirror, then the road ahead before quickly accelerating.

Jennsen knew her mom was trying to digest the possible implications that derived from her and Tim going 'way back.' It would be awkward dealing with her mother for the next couple of days, but the look on her face was worth it.

Needless to say, the rest of the drive was silent.

And Jennsen was smiling the whole way.

* * *

_I have a feeling I'll be writing from Yule's POV a little more. How's that sound for everyone?_


	11. The Calm

_Back again. Been a long time, I know. Happy New Year (and even more belated Merry Christmas)! How are you all? How's the fandom been?_

_This __story is still alive (as is evident), but it's taking its' time. I'm sorry that I haven't posted anything over the many months. RL be mucho busy. Hopefully this chapter makes up for some of my absence._

* * *

Chapter Ten – The Calm

Jennsen yawned as she rested her head in her left hand, her right hand twirling a black pen around her fingers. She tried reading through her spanish textbook but the words kept on blurring and she couldn't force herself to concentrate. Her headache didn't help any.

She hated Mondays. They were slow and boring and horrible.

"Hey, Jennsen, right?" She looked up to see Tyra standing in front of her. "Landry's mentioned you."

Yeah, and Landry hadn't stopped mentioning the fact that he and Tyra were together. Made it out like they were a power couple. Tyra and Landry. Tandry? Lyra? She'd have to brainstorm a few name combos with Yule on the drive home.

"Can I sit here?" Tyra asked.

"Sure, free country," Jennsen said, shutting her textbook.

"Let me just cut the crap and tell you why I'm here," Tyra said, though her tone was more compassionate than sharp.

Jennsen eyes snapped to Tyra as her eyebrows raised. "Okay."

"I saw you talking with Tim last Friday, before the game."

Jennsen didn't say anything, just kept staring at Tyra.

After the awkward pause, Tyra continued, "He's a good guy at the best of times, but those moments are few and far between. Don't get lured in by that."

Jennsen blinked. "I think you're seeing something out of nothing," she said slowly. "May not look like it to you, but nothing has happened between Tim and I and nothing is going to happen." She shook her head. "I don't think that way about him and that's that."

Tyra's eyebrows furrowed, her eyes sympathetic. "It's never that clear cut, honey."

Honey. It felt more patronising than anything. Good intentions or not, Tyra's concern irked her. "This is a circumstance where it is clear cut," she replied curtly.

"I've dealt with Riggin's issues before, and nothin' has changed," Tyra said calmly. "He uses females. That's what he's good for. There's no use trying to sway him." Her shoulder raised in a half shrug. "He ends up running away and you end up with a broken heart."

Jennsen opened her mouth to deny the statement but Tyra continued, "Girls 'round this school believe that they'll be the one to tame that devil inside him." Her eyes dropped to stare at the table as she took in a breath. "And as much as I hate to admit it, I thought I could too." She looked up at Jennsen and shook her head, her gaze imploring. "But it doesn't work. He's designed to be lonely. That's just how he is."

"I don't agree," Jennsen said. Maybe it was Yule influencing her, but she didn't feel that same sense of restraint she felt when voicing her opinions. "He may use girls, sure, I agree with that, but that doesn't mean that he needs to be alone or friendless. All of Dillon thinks bad of him. All they ever see is the bad in him, and because of that, he's just stopped trying to please." She paused to collect her thoughts, chewing her lower lip as she stared at her hands. "I know what it feels like to have people think less of you, and take pity on you. I understand on that level. That's why I'm helping him." She looked up at Tyra, leveling her with a serious and honest gaze. "But that's it. It goes no farther than that."

Tyra shook her head again. "Jennsen, I've known him since I was a kid; longer than you've been in Dillon. I loved him, shared with him, _gave_ myself to him. I tried to help him and he tossed me away like a piece of trash, time and time again." Her head titled as she searched Jennsen's eyes. "I just don't want that to happen to you."

"I understand, but... Tim and I are only friends." Not even that, Jennsen thought. In fact, she wasn't sure what they were. Either way, her reply to Tyra was weak. She inwardly cringed at the sound of it.

Tyra sighed and stood up. "You can't be 'just friends' with Tim. Please trust me on that. I do not want you to learn it the hard way."

And with that, Tyra left.

–

"You okay, Jenn?" Yule asked.

"Yeah," Jennsen said, pulling her textbooks out of her locker. The bell had rung and she was glad that Monday classes were finally over with. "Why, do I look sick or something?"

"No," Yule replied, closing her locker door for her. "Just thoughtful is all."

Jennsen was thoughtful, after what Tyra had said, but she didn't want to open that can of worms with Yule. Instead, she replied: "You've been looking a little thoughtful too. Care to share?" She wasn't blind to the fact that Yule was a little more quieter than usual.

Yule's lips pressed together as she hummed. "Touche." They walked side by side down the hall, out the double doors and into the parking lot. "Hey, do you mind if we drop by Applebees? I'm fucking starving."

"I thought you said you were sick of eating out," Jennsen reminded.

"Yeah, but it's not like I have decent meals waiting for me at home."

Applebees sounded good, but then Jennsen realised that Tyra worked there and, if she had a shift on today, that would be way too awkward. "Well, I can fix up some lunch for us," Jennsen said as they reached Yule's car.

"Wh..." Yule stopped, staring at Jennsen from over the driver's side of her car. "At your house?"

Jennsen shrugged. "Yeah."

Yule blinked. "Your parents should be back," she said slowly. "One of 'em, at least."

Jennsen shrugged again. "So?"

"'So'?" Yule's head moved back, her brow furrowing. "Call me crazy, but I don't think they have a nice impression of me. I think they'd care if they saw you hanging with me again."

"I don't care if they care," Jennsen replied, and she really meant it. She was sick of treading on eggshells around them.

Yule blinked again. "O-kay," Yule said in a higher octave. "Don't say I didn't warn you."

Jennsen laughed as Yule unlocked the car and she hoped into the passenger's side. "I thought you liked conflict."

Yule sat in the drivers side and put the key in the ignition. "I can tolerate conflict, easy. Doesn't mean I look for it." Yule paused, fastening her seatbelt before turning on the engine. "Seriously, Jenn, I don't want to cause any more grief between you and your parents."

Jennsen grinned. "That is so _sweet_ of you."

Yule shot Jennsen a frown as she changed gears, checking her mirrors before reversing out of the parking space.

–

"Ran out of ham and lettuce," Jennsen said, scanning the fridge as her fingers tapped against the door handle. "Does a cheese, tomato and mayo sandwich sound fine by you?"

"Better than nothing," Yule replied. She sat on the stool, resting her arms on the kitchen bench top as Jennsen rifled through the fridge.

Yule couldn't get over how clean this place was. Her eyes scanned over the kitchen, then the living room and the widescreen plasma TV. She remembered Jennsen mentioning that her parents had gone out of their way to buy it for Steve, since he spent so much time at home. Not because it was his birthday or because it was Christmas; just because it was Steve. Jennsen sounded kinda bitter about that, too.

As if thinking of the devil, Yule noticed Steve at the edge of the hallway, leaning on the railing attached to the wall. He didn't look too good.

His head lifted and his eyes locked on Yule. He stopped.

She stared back.

Jennsen was too busy fixing them up a late lunch to notice that her brother was in the vicinity.

Yule's eyebrow quirked and she tilted her head towards Jennsen, gaze darting from her best friend to Steve. She hoped he understood the meaning behind her silent message.

Eyes dropping to the floor for a moment, Steve looked back at Yule and nodded, then pushed himself off the railing and walked slowly towards the kitchen, wincing with each step.

"Hey, sis."

"Oh..." Jennsen seemed surprised that he was talking to her. "Hey."

Yule glanced at her folded arms before resting her chin on top of them.

Out of her peripheral vision, she saw Steve take out a bottle of prescription pills from the pocket of his pants. He moved past Jennsen to get a bottle of water from the fridge. He took two pills and a swig of water. Then he noticed what Jennsen was preparing. "Oooh, make me a sandwich?" he asked.

Jennsen's lips quirked. "Make it yourself."

"How can you say that? I'm physically and emotionally crippled, Jenny," Steve whined, adding a pout for good measure.

Yule snorted and he glanced at her from the corner of his eye. There was a smirk on his face as he leaned against the kitchen bench.

"Steve, have you taken your medication?" Erica called out. A click clack sound of high heels echoed in the distance, and it grew louder as Mrs. Keller began walking towards the kitchen. Crap.

"Yep. Just did," Steve replied.

Yule braced herself as Jennsen's mother entered the room. They locked eyes. "Hey there," Yule piped in, before there was any time for an awkward silence.

"Oh... Jennsen, I didn't know you were bringing..." her mother trailed off, caught by surprise at Yule's presence.

"This is my friend, Yule," Jennsen said, continuing to make her sandwich, almost ignoring the fact that there was a problem growing right in front of her.

"Yes, I remember," her mother continued, a little more sharply this time, but her face was all smiles.

Yule raised her eyebrows but made no comment, eyes darting to the kitchen top.

"Give it a rest, Mom," Steve said, almost offhandedly.

Shocked, Yule looked up at him with a confused frown.

"Steve," The feigned surprise in Erica's tone belied her visible outrage.

"She's a human being, just like the rest of us," Steve said, pushing himself off of the bench with one hand, clutching the water bottle with his other. "So try to treat her like one."

Although Yule appreciated being stuck up for, she was more surprised that he could get away with talking to his mother like that. No wonder they bought him a widescreen. She'd thought Jennsen was being too harsh when she spoke about her brother, but now she realized that it was true: Steve's injury let him get away with a lot of things.

Before Yule could even think to say anything, Steve was down the hall and shutting the door to his room.

Erica looked slightly embarrassed, but covered it up quickly. "Be sure to clean up once you're done, honey. And try not to make too much noise because you're father's sleeping." She forgot that Jennsen's dad worked night shifts. "I'll be back at seven. Cassie's taken Tommy to the park, so she'll be back in an hour or so."

"Okay," Jennsen nodded as she spread mayonnaise over the sandwich.

Yule waited until she heard the front door close and an engine start up before she said, "So, that felt awkward."

"Don't worry about it." Jennsen sounded almost as nonchalant as her brother. It was... weird.

"Well I do." Yule was a little exasperated. "I mean, all this just so I can have a sandwich?"

"My mom can get over it," Jennsen said, pulling out a bread knife to cut the sandwich in half on the chopping board. "I don't want to hide you or anything. You're my best friend, so..." She shrugged.

"Aww." Yule smiled. "That is so _sweet_ of you."

Jennsen looked up with an angry pout, lifting the sharp implement in her hand as she said, "I have a knife."

Yule's smile widened.

–

**Knock. Knock. Knock. **

Tim opened his eyes before shutting them again, his arm draped over his face to block out the sun. He was exhausted after football practice and cramming with Landry for his bio test. The effort that he was putting in was impressive, even if he said so himself. Still wasn't enough to sway Lyla, though. She continued looking at him with her judge filled eyes and pouty lips.

News had spread around school that Lyla's bible thumper boyfriend had dumped her. Tim was glad, but he knew that she cared about the guy.

**Knock. Knock. Knock. Knock.**

Tim stretched out on the sofa before getting up, scratching the back of his head as he walk towards the door. He rubbed at his eyes as he opened the door, yawning.

Lyla's hand was raised, about to knock, before she let it drop to her side. "Hey, Tim."

All he could do was blink. "Hey."

Her face was blank but her eyes were sorrowful.

Awkward pause.

Lyla looked away before glancing back at him. "I guess you already-"

"Yeah, I heard," he cut in. "There a reason why you're here?"

He could see the hurt in her eyes that she tried to hide from his blunt question.

"I'm sorry, I..." Lyla shut her eyes before opening them, searching his gaze. "Everyone said it was wrong, getting into anything with you and... I didn't want to believe them, I swear I didn't-"

Tim's brow furrowed as he looked away, licking his lips. "Lyla-"

"When you said you loved me, did you mean it?"

Warning bells were going off. He couldn't answer. Couldn't look her in the eyes. He knew this was trouble. Instead, his gaze was fixed firmly on her car parked out on the driveway.

Lyla stepped closer to him, tears filling her eyes. "Please, look at me." Her hands were placed on his face and his jaw clenched. She kissed the corner of his mouth. "Please... Tim."

Tim's eyes shut tight and his willpower snapped. He moved his face to hers, grabbing her waist and pulling her close as he kissed her, hard, hot and fast.

Tim stumbled back and shut the door, slamming her up against the wall. His head dipped down to kiss her neck, traveling further and further, his tongue running across her collarbone as goosebumps broke out across her skin.

He'd been waiting too long for this, but once they stumbled into his room, everything went by way, way too fast. He could never get enough of her. Ever. And through the haze of pleasure, all he could feel was pain. 'Cause in his gut, he knew he was being used; that she was hurting. Heartbroken. But he couldn't stop himself. And that was the worst part of it.

And when he woke up it was dark and his bed was empty.

Donned in boxers, he slipped out of his bed sheets, walking down the hall and towards the front of the house. He opened the front door and fly screen and scanned the driveway, lit up by the street lights.

Her car was gone. She was gone. Again.

Lyla probably hated herself for it, and hated him even more for going along with it.

He should've expected it. He did. And yet he went along with it.

Tim slammed the door shut. His brow furrowed as his forehead pressed against the wooden surface. He shut his eyes.

He was losing it. He'd already lost her. Not like he had her to begin with.

God, he felt like an idiot.

If Jennsen heard about this, he didn't know how she'd react.

He wanted to talk to her, he realised. He wanted to joke around with her and drink with her. He wanted someone to listen. But after what had just happened with Lyla, he found it strange that he was wondering about Jennsen.

Tim dismissed the thought, grabbing the bottle of bourbon that was on the kitchen counter before walking back to bed. Billy would probably tell him off for drinking it all, but he didn't care.

His mother once said that Jack was always there to heal her woes. She laughed about it, then started crying. He'd thought that Jack was her imaginary friend or something. He hadn't realized what she'd meant until much later. After she had left and his father had left soon after.

Tim twisted the cap off and slammed the door to his room.

–

Yule stood on the porch, leaning against the rails as she held Jennsen's little brother, Thomas. Last time she'd seen him (more than a year ago) he was in his newborn alien baby phase. Now he was babbling and giggly and adorable. He had dark blond hair and clear blue eyes. Just like his brother.

"You really are too cute for your own good," Yule muttered, watching as he played with her necklace.

He babbled some more, eyes fixed intently on the pendant.

"Hmm? What did you say?" she asked.

He looked up at her. "Purdy," he repeated. Pretty.

"Oh." Yule smiled. "Why thank you."

"This is one ironic situation we have here," a voice called out.

Yule looked over Thomas' head. Steve opened the fly screen door, stepping out before shutting it behind him. "I mean, you don't look like the baby holding type. More like baby eating." He smirked.

"I've held babies before," she reasoned.

"Sacrificed them for rituals?" Steve taunted.

"Shut up," Yule said flatly.

Steve's smirk widened.

"Jennsen told me to mind him, whilst she gets my CD," Yule explained.

Steve nodded. "Yeah, she told me to tell you that it's taking a while to find it." He rolled his eyes. "What's in the CD anyway?"

"Orchestral music. She likes listening to it."

"I want down," Thomas said, wriggling in her arms.

"Just as long as you go inside, Tommy," Steve said, walking towards Yule. Before she could question why he was getting so close, he picked up his baby brother. "I have The Lion King on the TV." He raised Thomas high over his head. "Remember Simba?"

Thomas grinned. "Simba grow big!"

"Yep. That he does." Steve put his brother on the ground and opened the front door for him, watching as he waddled down the hall and towards the lounge room where the movie was playing.

"Shouldn't we...?"

"He'll be fine," Steve answered. "He's been walking for a few months now, and doesn't wander off unless he's bored. The Lion King never bores him."

"Right," she said. And then there was an awkward pause. "Um, thanks for saying what you did, earlier on," Yule began. "To your Mom. I know I'm not exactly on her good side."

Steve folded his arms, looking down at his shoes, then at her. "No problem," he said.

Another awkward pause.

"What were you gonna say to Jenn last Friday? If I hadn't answered her phone..."

"I don't know." He looked across the porch, thinking a moment before shrugging. "Something mean, I guess. Kinda good that you stopped me."

Her eyebrow quirked. "Kinda?"

"A lot, then." There was a small smile on his face that showed his dimples. "Pick my words, why don't ya?"

And there wasn't much else she could think to say.

She look down at her hands, then checked her phone, then made sure her keys were in her pocket.

When she looked up she saw him looking at her. And instead of getting all awkward that he got caught looking at her, he just kept on staring.

"What?" Yule raised her eyebrows.

Steve shrugged, eyes darting to her shoes a moment before locking on her once more.

It was... unnerving.

"Seriously, what?" she asked.

"Did you tell Jenny about the call?" Steve asked.

Yule shook her head curtly. "No," she said slowly.

Something about his eyes confused her. Steve looked somewhat intrigued as he asked: "Why not?"

"I dunno." Yule shrugged, folding her arms. "I didn't think it was that important."

Steve's head tilted. "Important to her or important to you?"

Her brow furrowed. "Why are making a big deal about it?"

Steve smirked. "If it wasn't a big deal then why didn't you tell her?"

Yule rolled her jaw and sighed. "Ugh, shut up with your questions. You're so annoying."

"And you're cute when you're annoyed."

Yule blinked, eyes widening. She tried to control the heat rising to her face from his sudden flattery, and reminded herself that she wasn't thirteen. She was _not_ a blusher.

"Found it!" Jennsen opened the door.

Yule straightened, trying to cover up her jolt from the door being swung open so abruptly. She broke eye contact with Steve and looked at the CD Jennsen held out, taking it as she muttered her thanks.

"Sorry it took a while. I don't know how it got under my bed, but it did." She grinned. "Anyway, thanks for lending it to me."

"No worries." Yule cleared her throat a little. "Tom just went off to watch The Lion King. He got bored of me."

Jennsen laughed. "Thought I heard right. I've watched it so many times I'm sick of it," she quipped. "But he loves Simba, so..."

"He's a really well-behaved kid," Yule said.

Steve snorted.

So did Jennsen. "He's putting on a good show for you," she replied. "In an hour or so he'll be screaming and carrying on."

"I'll take your word for it, even if I find it hard to believe." Yule twirled her car keys with her index finger. "Anyway, I gotta scoot now."

"'Scoot?'" Steve scoffed. "How old are you, Wednesday?"

"Shut it," Yule snapped at Steve, walking down the steps and over to her car. She unlocked it, getting into the driver's side.

"See you tomorrow!" Jennsen called out.

Yule rolled down her car window before calling out: "See you! And thanks for the lunch!" She noticed that Steve was still smirking. She flipped him off before driving away. "Smug son of a bitch," she mumbled. Literally.

* * *

_Not so much Tim (or Tim/Jennsen) in this one, but there'll be more in the next chapter. It shall be the storm after the calm, when drunk!Tim decides to visit Jennsen at an ungodly hour in the morning. Got your intrigue yet? Ha! I am so terribly cruel! _


	12. The Storm

_Sorry about the massive delay! Life has been getting in the way and, after working on this story for so long, it tends to lose its spark at the drop of a hat. Not giving up on it though (I'm too stubborn for that)! Anyway, it's good to know people are still reading this fic. I hope you enjoy this latest chapter! Be prepared for the storm, is all I can say. :)_

* * *

Chapter Eleven – The Storm

"Knock, knock," came a voice from outside Jennsen's room.

"You can come in," Jennsen said, writing in her planner. She found it weird that her mother said the words rather than actually knocking.

Erica opened the door, entered, and shut it behind her. "Have you got a minute?"

"Yeah, I guess." Jennsen shut her planner, turning her swivel chair in the direction of her mother.

Erica sat on Jennsen's bed, facing her. "Honey..." Her lips pursed for a brief time. "Look, I don't think there's a nice way to go about this, so I'm just gonna rip this band-aid right off."

Jennsen's eyebrows raised quizzically.

"Are you dating Tim Riggins?" her mother asked.

Baffled, Jennsen let out a breath as she tried to suppress her laughter.

"I am dead serious, Jennsen," she said, and her voice was hard as stone.

"No."

"Have you ever dated him before?"

An image flashed through her head of Tim winking at her on their drive to the supermarket. What would he say if he knew about this?

She couldn't help it. She had to laugh.

"No," Jennsen answered.

"Okay then." Her mother cracked a smile. All seriousness fled, she added: "Are you seeing anyone?"

Jennsen's brow furrowed. "Mom," she said, her voice standoffish. She could feel her ears go a little red.

They'd never talked about this before, never shared, or even had the sex talk (and for that much, Jennsen was grateful). The very fact that her mother was talking about this felt awkward and strange.

"I'm just curious," Erica said in that higher-pitched 'o-kay, but I _am_ your mother' tone. "I have a right to know if my daughter's interested in anyone."

"You don't need to worry about that for now," Jennsen said.

"But when I do...?"

"When you do, I _might_ just let you know," Jennsen answered with a grin.

Her mother sighed dramatically. "So, it's nice to see that you and Steve are getting along together in the same room," Erica observed, changing topics.

"Mhmm." Jennsen's thoughts drifted back to their interaction in the kitchen, and to then her mother. "It'd be nicer if you got along with Yule, though."

"That goth?"

"Mom," Jennen's tone was admonishing. "People dress the way they feel comfortable dressing. Yule may look outlandish to you, but that doesn't mean she's a devil worshipper."

"I never said that," Erica said, on the defensive.

"I know, but I'm sure you thought it because you implied as much," Jennsen said sternly.

"I did'n–"

"You did, Mom," Jennsen cut in. "Don't tell me you didn't."

"I just..." Erica paused, looking as though she was collecting her thoughts. "I don't want you getting into the wrong sorts of circles at school. I worry about that and your future and your interests."

"Yule's a great friend. You're worrying over nothing." Jennsen stared at her hands in her lap. "I tried not to think that my friends back in Austin were like Penny; just there for show and for popularity. But when Steve had the accident and you and Dad decided we should move, they dropped me like a hot potato." Jennsen stared down at her hands and heard her Mom get up, walk towards her, and rub her back in sympathy. Her eyes watered a little.

"I'm sorry that we forced that on you," Erica said.

"No, it's okay," Jennsen reassured. "Took four years, but I'm finally happy with the way things are. It's not easy, but... Dillon's our home now."

Her mother smiled a little. "I'm glad you think so."

"Anyway, I'm heading to bed," she said, a little awkwardly. "I've got a test tomorrow."

"Right. Goodnight sweetie." Jennsen felt her mother kiss her on the forehead. "See you in the morning."

"Night Mom."

–

Jennsen's eyes flew open. She blinked, trying to get past her surreal, half-awake state. She realized that her phone had buzzed. Her hand fumbled along the desk, trying to find it.

There was a thud, and she realized that her phone had dropped on the floor. Her arm reached out, fingers feeling for the mobile on the floorboards. Frustrated, she got out of bed and turned on her lamp, squinting against the sudden glare of light.

She spotted her phone, leaned over to grab it, then checked the screen. There was a missed call at 1:15am, from a number she didn't know.

That was when she heard the sound of an approaching car outside her street. Peeping through her blinds, she saw a car pull up to the front of her house.

It was Tim's truck.

Jennsen's mouth opened. "Shit." She walked over to the door, about to open it, then thought that she should probably put on some shoes. She went back to her bed, leaning over to pick up her slippers. Then she opened her door as quietly as she could, because its creak was loud and god awful, then crept down the staircase and carefully unlocked the front door.

Out on the porch, in her tank top and shorts, Jennsen was freezing. She hadn't thought about getting her dressing gown, or a jumper. But at least she had her slippers. She realized they were still in her hand, and so she put the slippers on and marched over to Tim's truck.

Tim stepped out of his car and walked towards her, bottle in hand. He stumbled with a few steps, but managed to reach her. Jennsen couldn't believe that Tim was drunk _right outside her house_, but at the same time she was surprised (and relieved) that he hadn't gotten himself in an accident getting here. Then she had to remind herself that it was past one in the morning.

"How do you know where I live?" Her tone was an equal mix of annoyed and curious. "And when did you get my number?"

"Small town, Filler." Tim's gaze scanned down her body briefly.

Jennsen folded her arms, unsettled by his stare. She could tell that he was way too drunk (which, in Riggins standards, was saying something), but she didn't dare point it out.

"I need some…" Tim paused, licking his lips as he lifted the bottle, staring at it before adding, "Some advice."

Jennsen's brow scrunched in exasperation. "At one in the morning?" She rubbed her eyes with the palms of her hands, talking all the while, "Tim, I'm not your coach on how to get a 'W' on a gal. This kinda thing isn't a game play. It isn't a sport." She pulled her hands away and faltered at his expression. She took a breath, using the moment to collect her words, and patience. "This is about Lyla, right?" Tim nodded. "You wanna win her over?" He nodded again. "Well, if you want her to love you, you use your own brain for it."

"But yours is so much better," Tim quipped.

"Get in your car, sleep off the alcohol, and go home, please." Jennsen's voice wasn't gentle, but it wasn't harsh or demanding either. She knew he wasn't in his right mind, physically or emotionally.

"Can't do that," Tim said simply.

"Why the hell not?" Jennsen asked. No answer. "Okay, can I ask you a question, Tim?" She didn't need to ask, nor did she need his permission. She just didn't know how to begin.

"Shoot," he said quickly, casually.

"What am I to you?" Jennsen's shoulder raised in a shrug, her arms folded against the cold. "I mean, it's not like we say 'hi' to each other at school, or spend time with each other at the library just for the sake of it." Her lips pressed together for a moment. "What I'm saying is: there's always a means to an end. I don't know if I'm a friend or..." Her eyes stared at the ground. "Or less than that," she finished. Her eyes lifted, gauging him. "So what am I to you?" she asked.

Jennsen was met with silence, but she stubbornly waited for an answer.

"I don't know," Tim finally murmured, softly.

That didn't help her at all. In fact, she was just as confused as before.

After more silence, this time on her part, Jennsen said, "I'm tired and I have a test tomorrow, so I'm just gonna go now, okay?"

When Tim didn't answer, she turned around.

Then his hand held hers suddenly.

"Uh, wh–?"

Before Jennsen could register what he was doing, or finish her sentence, he turned her around and stepped towards her, his body pressed lightly against hers. His hands were placed around her waist, both warming her and holding her in place. His head dipped down, eyes locked on her mouth, then he leaned in a little, then he kissed her.

Jennsen's eyes were still open, her lips not moving. She could smell the bourbon on his breath. Feel his lips move softly against her mouth, trying to encourage her. Feel his fingers drawing circles on her back, raising goosebumps.

Jennsen blinked, placed her hands on Tim's chest and pulled her head back, staring into his eyes. In his gaze, she saw a desire that stunned her. Made her feel like something inside her was falling fast and rising high at the same time.

It was the alcohol and heartache, Jennsen told herself, but it didn't put a stopper on the havoc it wreaked on her.

"Who do you think I am? Lyla– or, or Tyra? Or some no-name rally girl?" Jennsen pulled away from Tim as his hold on her loosened, taking a few steps backward. "I didn't even think I was like that to you."

Tim stared down at the floor, head tilted to the side.

"Do you need to get laid that bad?" she asked. Tim went still against the silence. Then he lifted his head slowly, but she couldn't read his expression. Her voice was quieter as she added, "Or is it that you need to feel loved that bad?"

Tim lips parted as he watched her, trying to say something but failing.

She didn't know what to think.

She didn't know what he thought.

"Why're you here?" Jennsen asked him, tired and on the verge of tears.

There was a pause, and then: "I have nowhere else to go."

Jennsen's brow furrowed as her hand rested over her mouth, fingers and thumb spread over the span of her jaw as she thought. Her eyes kept welling up and she kept blinking the tears away. She had to wait for the lump in her throat to go before she pulled her hand away and spoke, "Okay... I'll sit with you." Jennsen took the bottle from his hand, figuring it was better if he didn't drink any more of it. Then she sat on the curb beside Tim's truck.

This was insane.

It was the middle of the night and she was out on her front yard with a very drunk Tim Riggins, the notorious Fullback of the Dillon Panthers. If the neighbors saw or her mother checked outside the window, she'd be in big trouble. But she was too tired to think straight, too shocked by what had just happened.

Tim sat beside her, slipped off his jacket and placed it over her shoulders.

At least he was a gentlemen when drunk.

"Thank you," Jennsen said.

"Welcome," Tim said, and kissed her cheek, draping his arm around her shoulders, hand rubbing up and down her arm for warmth.

Jennsen looked down, unsure of what to make of his actions towards her.

They sat next to one another in silence.

–

The sun was close to rising when Tim woke, his head spinning (that was a given). He looked around, but Jennsen was nowhere in sight (that, too, was a given).

Tim remembered bits and pieces, like Jennsen helping him to his car, like him wanting her to keep the jacket, and Jennsen insisting that it would be better off if he kept it. He couldn't remember what else she said, or what he'd said.

But he remembered kissing her.

He remembered thinking that she felt soft and warm and sweet; just how she looked.

And when he realized this, and what he'd done, he knew he'd crossed a line. A big, fucking _taboo_, line.

So Tim drove home, head reeling, the buzz still lingering in him from the alcohol. But he focussed on driving, trying to keep his mind on that single task. When he pulled into his driveway and slammed the door to his car, he stopped, right hand resting on the top of his truck, the other on his hip as he stared at the grass.

Tim took a deep breath in, then out. He combed a hand through his hair. Then he trudged on inside.

He was a drunken mess. His whole life was fucking drunken mess. His mom, his dad. The apple hadn't fallen far from the tree, he thought, and he knew almost everyone in town had thought that of him.

How could he pull Jennsen into that?

He'd done so before, with all the homework he'd dumped on her, and he'd broken her trust like the click of a finger. And just when he thought he'd managed to patch that up, he had to go and fuck it all up again.

But this time, it was different.

This time, it was far more complicated. He didn't know if he could fix this.

When Tim went inside, his brother was up and making breakfast.

"Where the hell were you?" Billy said from the kitchen.

"Out," Tim answered.

"'Out'," Billy repeated. "Yeah, I guessed that much. I'm not stupid, Tim." Pause. "And where's my bottle of JD? You know how much that costs, don't you?"

Tim didn't answer. He sat on the stool, arms folded on the counter in front of him, resting his head on his forearms.

He heard Billy walk over to him, from the opposite side of the counter, and lean over. "What the hell, Tim?! You gonna answer me?!"

Tim looked up and stared at his brother.

Billy searched his eyes, then faltered, mouth opening, then closing. He knew something was up.

"You want something to eat?" Billy asked, a little quieter.

Tim nodded. "Yes, please."

Billy handed him a plate with a toasted sandwich, cut in half. "This about Garrity?" he finally asked.

Tim thought about it as he took a bite of the sandwich. "Not anymore, no," he said.

–

Jennsen looked into the bathroom mirror, all puffy eyes and red nose and lips.

Tyra had told her. She hadn't listened. Had been all stubborn and naïve.

But Tyra was right.

Jennsen couldn't be 'just friends' with Tim.

Why on earth did she have to get herself so involved? Why was she so incredibly stupid about all this?

It was Tim Riggins, after all.

People considered him a god on the football field, never mind his devilish reputation outside the sport. After all, that was what Riggins was, right? Part god, part devil? She didn't realize she was trying to save someone who didn't want to be saved. But she was, and she wasn't going to kid herself into believing otherwise. He wasn't some riddle or puzzle to solve. He wasn't a car in need of fixing. He was a person with flaws, like everyone else. He lived his life the way he wanted to, just like everyone else.

Jennsen could've just let him be, but she didn't.

She saw another Steve just waiting to happen.

Truth be told, she hadn't even considered liking Tim. He was the one that all the other girls fawned over. The idea of that was off-putting enough, besides the fact that she could never see herself being interested in him, or his type. And she could never see him being interested in her or her type either. That was just fine by her.

Then he had to go and kiss her.

And it got her thinking about him in a more than friendly way.

"I'm an idiot," she said to herself, staring at her eyes as they welled up.

Jennsen knew that Tim was looking for a quick fix, and she was the closest target. She was more hurt than flattered by the gesture, because she realized what she was to him. She had been willing to help him, to listen, without so much as a thank you, or an acknowledgement of her existence. Filler Inner, that was what she was. Not a friend or a more-than friend. An acquaintance; neither one or the other. And an altruistic one at that.

It made her feel no different than a rally girl. Left a hurt in her that ran too deep for words.

Jennsen looked up at the ceiling, blinking her tears back. Her throat hurt as she fought back the urge to cry some more.

She couldn't stomach the thought of going to school, seeing him, but she had an exam first thing in the morning, and she couldn't afford to fake being sick because of it. So, numbly, she washed her face with cold water, put concealer on the bags under her eyes, got changed, packed her bag for school and spent the drive in Yule's car revising her English Lit notes.

Yule seemed too tired to notice anything was up, reciting notes that she put on her sun visor to do with Oscar Wilde.

Jennsen would just have to get through the day.

_It'll only be a few hours,_ she thought.

She could handle that much.

–

Yule's eyes stung every time she blinked, and her head felt fuzzy. Her preparation for the exam had been last minute, and went on through the night. It was her own fault for procrastinating, really, but she didn't regret it. She hated English Lit, and made sure Mrs. Sullivan knew it.

Yule's hands were cramping and she had no idea what she'd written down, but the exam was over, and she was thankful for that. She dreaded finding out her marks, though.

She saw Jennsen walk out of the classroom a few doors down.

"Jenn!" Yule called out, curious to see how she'd gone for the in-class essay.

Jennsen didn't turn around, just kept on walking. Her shoulders were tense, and shaking a little.

Worried and suddenly alert, Yule followed Jennsen out of school, jogging up to her. "Jenn!" She'd finally caught up when she noticed the tears in Jennsen's eyes. "Jenn, what's wrong?"

"I can't handle it," she said.

"'Handle' what?" she asked, but Jennsen just kept on walking. "You're gonna walk home?" No answer. "Let me give you a lift, at least," she offered, walking in front of her and stopping Jennsen in her tracks.

"I don't feel like talkin', Yule" Jennsen mumbled, her eyes red.

"That's okay. You don't have to say a thing to me, or explain. And I won't say a thing either. Just let me drive you home."

"You're not skipping class for me," Jennsen said, head down and avoiding Yule's gaze.

"After that test, I deserve a day off."

Jennsen paused for a long time. "Do you have a tissue?" she asked.

Yule took out the packet in her bag and handed it to Jennsen.

"Thank you." She put a tissue to her nose, still not looking at Yule as she said, "A ride home would be nice."

–

The drive was silent. Yule heard Jennsen's shuddered breaths but she didn't say anything. She kept her word. Even though she felt awful.

As soon as they got to her house, Yule asked, "Is it alright if I come in with you?"

"Okay," Jennsen said, exiting the car.

Yule locked her car and went inside the Keller residence. She'd barely seen the inside of the place; felt like an intruder when she did. She stopped by the foyer, staring at her best friend.

"I think I'll go have a shower," Jennsen told her, her voice still froggy, eyes and lips and nose red from crying, the tissue crumpled in her hand.

"Okay," Yule said. "I'll be downstairs. When you're ready to talk, just let me know. Even if you don't want to talk about... whatever it is that's upsetting you." It felt awkward to say, but she was glad she said it. She didn't exactly want to hightail out of there.

Jennsen nodded. "I'm sorry that you skipped school for me."

Her sincerity was endearing. She'd never known a nicer person in Dillon until Jennsen.

"Don't think so highly of yourself, Jenn," Yule said lightly. "You were just an excuse for me to ditch. Besides, I don't think my teachers would appreciate me sleeping in class, so you kinda did me a favor."

Jennsen smiled a little.

"Go have your shower," Yule said softly. She watched Jennsen trudge up the stairs and turned to find Steve opening the door to his room. His hair was messy, eyes a little foggy from sleep.

"Why're you here?" he asked.

She waited till she heard Jennsen's door close before she answered, "Jenn walked out of school. If she had it her way, she would've walked all the way here."

"What's wrong?" he asked, gripping the railing along the hall.

"She won't say. I want to check up on her, but I don't want to be too pushy, so... I guess I'm just waiting." Yule rubbed at her eyes, wanting to ease the ache behind them.

Steve nodded, a little pensive. "You wanna watch TV?"

Yule thought on it, then shrugged. "Sure."

"I can get you a drink...?"

Yule's eyebrows shot up. "You don't have to–"

"I know I don't, but I don't mind." He said it so casually that she was shocked. Usually, he was never this polite, or hospitable.

"Okay. Water'll be fine, thanks."

Steve nodded. "Sure. Remote's on the table." He gestured down the hall.

Yule walked over to the lounge room, grabbed the remote and sat down on one end of the couch, practically sinking into the cushion. Comfy. She turned on the TV.

After a while, Steve arrived and sat down on the other end of the couch, handing her a bottle. She gave him the remote in return and he flicked through the channels silently.

Yule wasn't bothered so much by the silence, but by something that was behind it.

She'd find herself turning, glimpsing at his profile, then looking away, wriggling in her seat and sipping from the water bottle he'd given her.

Something felt different. Charged. She wasn't sure if he felt it, but she sure did.

And she couldn't get what he'd said to her before out of her head.

_You're cute when you're annoyed._

Then she felt bad thinking about him, when Jennsen was obviously upset about something.

Frustrated and exhausted, Yule let her head drop back on the headrest of the couch, folding her arms. Her eyes were getting droopy, the lack of sleep creeping in so fast she hadn't noticed until she nodded off slightly. The moment she tried to keep herself awake, she found herself drifting off to sleep.

–

"Yo Tim? Are you listenin'?" Brooks asked. Tim looked up from his lunch tray. There was a headache building behind his eyes, partly from his hangover and partly from the English test he was sure he'd flunked that morning. Brooks continued, heedless of Tim's dour mood: "The Stratton sisters are planning a party this weekend. You in?"

"Not interested," Tim replied.

"You serious?" Brooks stared at him, beyond shocked that he'd turned down the offer.

"Been there, done that," he said flatly.

There was a chorus of laughter from the jocks sitting with him on the bench, but Tim wasn't laughing. He looked around the cafeteria for Jennsen, even her goth friend, but couldn't find them.

"I'll catch you boys later," Tim said. He grabbed his bag and headed over to the library.

He kept his head down as he walked, ignoring the occasional voice calling out to him. Once at the library, he made his way towards the desk they usually sat at, glancing around the area. No signs of Jennsen.

Something was filling in the pit of his stomach, a dread, a guilt, that he couldn't shake.

He saw Landry sitting by one the school's computers and walked up to him. "Where's Jenn?"

"Wh...?" Landry look up, blinked at Tim. "Jennsen?" Tim nodded. "Uh, I think I saw her leave with Yule after–"

Tim didn't wait to hear anymore, just took off, out of the library, the school building. He walked over to his truck in the parking lot and threw his bag in the passenger's seat. He stood there for a minute, then reached over and opened up the glovebox. He grabbed the old phone resting on a stack of old mail.

A few years back, Street's parents had bought Jay a new phone for his birthday, and since he didn't need the old one anymore, he'd given it to Tim (_'to remind your sorry self when practice is on,'_ Jason quipped). Tim didn't like phones, but girls liked texting him, and giving him their numbers, so he didn't mind so much. After a while, he'd lost track of who was who, and then Tyra was calling him up on it and yelling at him, saying he was a 'no-good lying scumbag' or 'cheating son of a bitch'. Soon enough, he'd turned the phone off; tossed it in the glovebox of his car. He hadn't used it since.

He didn't know why he decided to turn it on last night. Drinking had gotten him to thinking, and then to acting on his drunken thinking. The phone still had a few dollars of credit in it. _Why not call Jenn?_ he'd thought. He'd written down her number a while back, during a boring study session in the library, when Landry had gone to the bathroom and given Tim a brief reprieve from cramming. Landry's phone had been buried under the open books scattered across the table. Tim had heard it buzz. Tempted for lack of anything else to do, he pulled the phone out. Saw Jennsen's name on the screen.

**– _Thanks for sharing your thoughts –_**

He didn't know what her message meant, but her number was on the screen, and Tim kept on thinking that he wanted her to see the game on Friday night. Needed her to. He had to show her that he wasn't a quitter. That, and he wanted to help her, too. And if she was planning on ignoring his offer, then he would just have to resort to calling her up on the night and asking her where she was. He wasn't a quitter.

It was with sheer luck that he'd managed to find her street last night, remembering vague details that she had mentioned about her area, and her neighbors.

_Rotten luck,_ Tim thought upon reflection, and before he realized what he was doing, he was already checking the recent calls and dialing Jennsen's number.

"_Yeah_," Jennsen answered.

Tim didn't expect her to answer. "You're not here," he said.

"_I know_," she replied, and her voice was a little rough.

Pause. "I wanted to talk to you, but you're not here." There was silence. "I want to apologize for yesterday night. I was drunk and messed up and..."

"_I know_," she said, her voice far more strained.

"I want to say much more to you than that, you deserve much more, but all I got are apologies."

"_Tim_–"

"It wasn't right, what I did, and I promise you it won't ever happen again." He was startled by the strength in his voice, but he didn't question it.

"_...Okay._"

He didn't know what to make of her tone, but he knew that he hadn't made anything right between them. Things were different now.

"Jenn?"

"_Yeah?_"

"I really am sorry. I hope you get that. This isn't just some..." He paused, hating himself and his words. "I'm really sorry."

Her breaths were shaky on the other end and he could hear her sniffing as she said, "_I know_."

"You're crying," Tim said, and his eyes wandered to the ground, darting this way and that as his brow furrowed. "Shit. I'm... Let me just come over–"

"_No, please don't! My dad's here. I don't know how long he'll be asleep for. And my brother's around, and so's Yule." _Pause. _"It's not a good idea at the moment."_

He gripped the phone tighter, looking up at the sky for a second. "I want to do something." His voice was rough, desperate. "I don't want you to..."

"_Just give it some time, please._"

"Alright." Tim shut his eyes. He heard the click on the other end as the call disconnected. "I'm sorry."

–

Yule awoke to discover that she was lying on the couch, her shoes slipped off. A blanket was draped over her.

She blinked, widening her eyes in an attempt to become alert.

"You haven't slept in a while, have you?" Steve asked.

Yule shook her head. "What's the time?" Her voice felt and sounded rough.

"Little past twelve." Steve watched her as she stretched and yawned. "You're lucky my dad's a heavy sleeper, otherwise he'd've woken up to your snoring."

"I don't snore."

Steve's lips pressed together to contain a smile. She could see his dimples. "Sure, whatever you say."

"You're a dick," Yule snapped, but her voice had no volition. She really was tired.

"You're cuter when you're asleep."

"Yeah, as opposed to when I'm awake and snappy, I get it," she said groggily, running a hand over face.

"Nope. Still cute when you're awake." Steve did that thing where he bit his lip and smiled. "Just cut_er_ asleep."

"And you're still a dick," Yule said, alarmed by how his comments were flustering her, but trying hard not to show it.

Steve's smile didn't wane. "Whatever you say," he said, and his tone was a little softer and his eyes were unnerving.

Yule blinked. "Has Jennsen come downstairs yet?" she asked, diverting his attention.

Steve's smile dropped as he shook his head. "Nope."

Yule walked up the staircase and lightly knocked on the door to her room.

"Yeah?" came a muffled voice.

"Did you want some company?" Yule asked gently.

"Not really, no. It's just... I'm kind of a mess right now." Her voice and her words let Yule know that Jennsen was still upset.

Yule's brow furrowed. "Alright, well... I can stop by tomorrow, if you'd like? Bring over some food from the Alamo?" she suggested.

"Okay. Thanks, Yule."

"No problem," she said. "You take it easy."

Yule waited, but didn't hear anything else from the other side of the door. She sighed, then walked down the steps, feeling helpless. Feeling like she was a shitty friend. She didn't like the feeling.

"How is she?" Steve asked from the bottom of the staircase, arms resting on the end of the railing.

"Not good." Yule paused, voice a little quieter. "It's frustrating because she's shutting me out."

Steve snorted. "She's been doing that ever since we moved here. She's real good at it. Mom and Dad have given up trying to get her to open up." When he took in her expression, he followed up, "She'll come 'round to you, though."

Yule headed to the entrance of the house, taking out her keys from her pocket, staring down at the floor. "I hope she will."

Then there was silence and she felt it again, that charged, tense feeling. She looked up and saw him watching her.

"See you later," Steve said.

"Yeah," she said back. Then blinked. "Did you take off my shoes?"

"Yep," she said, completely nonchalant. "Didn't want them scuffing the couch. Mom would kill me."

Yule nodded. "Okay, well where'd you put 'em?"

He smiled and didn't say anything.

Her eyes narrowed. "Steve..."

"Relax. Bottom of the staircase." he gestured to them. "You completely missed it." She went over and sat on the staircase, slipping her shoes on. "Just wanted to see how long it'd take before you realized you forgot 'em."

She looked up at him to glare. "Asshole."

He saluted mockingly with his middle and index fingers. "See you tomorrow, Yule."

Yule felt an strange mix of warmth, curiosity, guilt and frustration and no matter how much she tried to squash the feeling, it wouldn't go away. She finished tying her shoe laces then exited the house, shutting the front door behind her.

Yule went to her car, turning momentarily to stare up at the window on the second floor. The blinds were drawn down. Jaw clenched, she drove off.

–

Tim didn't feel like school, so he skipped class but went to practice. At least he could forget a little, vent a little, out on the field. Coach seemed caught off guard by the strength in his tackles, but didn't question it, or pull him aside. He was thankful for that.

When Tim got home after school Lyla was there, out on his driveway.

"You here for another fuck?" Tim asked bluntly, slamming his car door. "Or to tell me it was all just a mistake?" He swung the keys into his hand, walking over to the doorstep. "Or to do both?"

"Tim, I–"

"No, I don't wanna hear it," Tim cut her off, turning around to face her. He hadn't been strong enough to say 'no' to her until now, because the moment he got to staring into Lyla's eyes, he'd cave. Now, there was a numbness that settled over him, and a sick feeling. "I hurt someone because of you." Jennsen's words echoed in his head. "Because you need to feel loved that bad." He combed a hand through his hair. "I'd be stupid if I said this was all your fault, 'cause I'm just as bad for caving in. But she..." He faltered. "She didn't deserve it."

"'She'?" Lyla asked, but there wasn't anger to it. More a curiosity, and maybe a slight jealousy, even though she had no right to be jealous.

Tim paused before saying: "Whatever this is, it's done." He knew he wasn't completely over her, but feelings be damned, he knew he was done with her. He just wished that Jennsen didn't have to get hurt in the process. "You go on and find someone else."

"You've been practically stalking me for weeks; at the diner, at church, at the radio station." Lyla studied his face for a moment, a little surprised and a little confused. "Why are you so different all of the sudden?"

Tim didn't say anything.

"That's okay," she said softly, nodding. "It's okay to be mad at me."

"You have no idea," Tim replied, and his tone was low and dark.

"I'm sorry," she said.

"Honestly, I'm not even sure what you're apologizing for anymore," Tim said, shaking his head, brow furrowed incredulously. "You've fucked me up so many times I've lost count of the reasons."

Lyla flinched and there were tears in her eyes. "I'm sorry about everything. And that you've hurt someone you love." He looked away, avoiding her gaze, jaw clenched. "I won't come around again."

"Thank you," he said, and he meant it.

* * *

_Not exactly an ideal first kiss (especially eleven chapters into the story), but this is what gets the ball rolling. Please, feel free to let me know your thoughts! What should Jenn do? What should Tim do? Is anyone else interested in the Steve/Yule (Sule) storyline? Tell me what you think! _


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